just me with God

2006-06-24T22:32:00.000+08:00

yEs!

www.crappi.blogspot.com is up again (but with no updates!) Hahs

2006-04-29T13:21:00.000+08:00

Do not you feel solemn reading my lengthy and *boring* entries at times? Sometimes I do wonder what caused me to unintentionally lengthen my entries. It is also undeniable that there are entries which are short.

What I personally feel is that I ought to close down this blogsite. Afterall, the very first objective I purposes in my heart is to impact the readers with what God has done in my life, and to share God's love through my entries. It was certain that there was a period of time when I felt in my heart that my entries served as a motivator not only to others, but myself too whenever I read about it.

However, it is sad to say that such entries seem to have ceased. And typing every single entry has then become something rather tormenting to my brain because I always force my whatever juices to be squeezeed out from my mind...

Blogging has inevitably served as a medium for me for me to practice my English language as I take note of my grammar in my entries. Attempts to use new words which I have learnt seemed to be rather futile. This would seem rather disappointing, but I cant exactly be bothered by it since I have other more issues to attend to in my life.

My love for blogging has reduced from 100% to a mere 10%.. So I have decided to abandon this whole site while only occasionally visit this site so as to link me to my close friends. But no updates for sure. =)

2006-04-27T23:28:00.000+08:00

Having felt uneasy after posting my last entry, I decided to delete it.

It was after some time do I remember that I have got two personalities. At times, I do need space to be alone but then again, I do enjoy being part of a crowd. And I shall not elaborate much...

P.S To Rong Shan, thanks lot for missing me! Hahs! I miss u too! Btw, Congrats to you for going to somewhere you've longed for.

2006-04-20T13:42:00.000+08:00

Sitting down and staring at the screen of my laptop certainly sparked forth several thoughts. Having just visited Raymond's blog (My primary aka SA's 1st 3 mths OG mate), countless questions came bombarding into my mind.

One particular interesting comment that he made was that life is rotten, even with us Christians around it does not make any difference. Despite being a Christian himself, such a harsh comment certainly comes by more than a reason.

I've extracted part of his blog entry (and I hope that he will not mind):
The world is rotten; very rotten. With Christians around, it doesn't make much difference. Seeing people in church insulting one another; being sacarstic...

You see, how many of us are actually the people whom he have mentioned? Our second commandment as given by Jesus while He was on earth is to one another like we love ourselves. And by Raymond's entry, the question pondering in my mind is: do people like to insult themselves so much so they start to apply this insulting habit of theirs on others? If that is people's way of showing love to themselves, then that would be just the manner they are going to treat others.

But of course, if the habit of criticising the acts of oneself is not present in one's life, I see no reason for this particular being to start criticizing the people around him/her. In short, this person is no different from a hypocrite. And I strongly believe that such a behaviour arises due to a dearth of a particular substance in a person's life; (in my opinion, it is) love.

We must always remember to treat people only the way we want others to treat us. Would it not be unreasonable for an evil or self-centered or stingy being to expect great gifts and treatments permanently from the people around him/her?

But nonetheless, I still believe that the love of God is able to change such a person for the better. Let's just say that if I have come across someone like I have mentioned above, I might just befriend with this person and keep him/her in prayers.

A person's physical features (eyes, nose etc) cannot be changed, but his/her heart can be changed! That is why the world says that the only constant is change. This change is not confined in the realm of the economical or political situations of every country, but it also applies to the people alive on this earth!

And so, I believe that there is no heart that is so 'strong' which will not be melted by the love of God as demostrated by His children; us.

For me, I have been changed so much because of the love God and His children has poured unto me when I first went to church.

I do not deny that I used to be a self centered and evil person. Living in such a competitive country, I believe that most of the kids would just act the way I used to...

Recalling my Sec. 2 year, I kept all the notes I had and kept asking around for more summary notes from my friends.So when my classmates got to know that I had cogent points to support several questions as asked in Literature, they asked me the notes in return. Worrying that they might score better than me, I rejected their offers and told them that what the teacher provided in class was already sufficient. Such a selfish act of certainly terrible.

That was then the streaming year for secondary school students. The only matter bothering in my mind at that time was how I should continue to keep my notes away from my classmates so that I could ace among them.

I did rather well for the first half year in Sec. 2, but my performance dropped for no particular reason during the end of year examinations. Despite feeling disaapointed, I had somehow attained the top 3 position in class then.

Feeling satisfied, I told myself that I want to work even harder the moment I promote to Sec 3 back then. But then more doubts surrounded me when the thought of me being in the class of the top 3s in other express classes came to me. Inside me, I thought that it might have been impossible to continue to excel with so many bright students. And how I should protect my own notes so that they will not steal my stuff from me...

That was the me then.

However, things took a new turn unexpectedly when I attended a Christmas celebration at CHC with my band seniors in Dec 2002, just the month before my Sec 3 life started.

Over there, I accepted God and wanted to know Him more because He was able to provide me with the unending love that many people have been searching for in their hearts. Slowly, I learnt to share things, not only in my family but in school too. The Bible states that we should love people like the way we love ourselves. So the self loving me, started to apply this.

I started by helping anyone in my class who needed help in their studies. I also shared with them the personal notes that I made during my revision then. And slowly, I find myself learning more than I could have imagined. And as I helped, I continued to pray to God for wisdom and understanding. And when the year ends, I remembered myself getting a fifth place in the whole express cohort with 6As out of 7 subjects. That was also the most glorious period of my school life.

If God can change me, and use me so mightily, I see no reason why God cannot do the same for you too! All these are gifts and promises God has promised in the Bible, but there is just ONE condition; you have to accept God into your life. And that was what I did in the first place! Have you?

2006-04-17T18:55:00.000+08:00

Though I am back here blogging, I personally feel that I have lost my inspiration to blog. For the past few busy days, I remembered myself wanting to blog about several issues. However due to the STM (short term memory) that I am experiencing, all those matters are forgotten in both my mind and heart. This brings to light about something: that these issues are afterall not very imprtant in my life. and that explains why I do not put in much effort to keep them in rememberence. *Evil Laughters!*

1 thing that keeps my life exciting and adventurous as ever is my walk with my living Saviour; Jesus! Life is hardly a routine though my school timetable and the things I do in school are planned out on a weekly basis! Surprises will just spring out from my left and right every now and then! Hahs. These surprises can sometimes be pleasant and enjoyable. But nonetheless, unhappy surprises do occur.

Let's take for example the Chemistry and Math lecture tests which I took last week. The questions came as shocks for me, that is simply because I spent more time scratching my head than writing. I admit that the lack of practice was the core to me acting in a asinine manner during the test.

Those two tests definitely dampened my heart! But somehow, I was determined not to let setbacks stop me from moving forward; scoring well in future test. So I have since then picked myself up and am determined to continue putting in my best in my studies. Hahs. If I can pick myself up from setbacks and move forward with an optimistic attitude, you too can!
(PS: NYJ, you can do it too! Go go go! And stop telling me that you are going to get 3/30 for the next Chem test!!!)

Great suprises are often laid after bad experiences! I had a great Easter Celebration with my church on Sunday!

The morning service simply refreshes me despite me waking up early to queue up! Hahs. Praise and worship was vibrant as ever and on top of that, the drama simply tops everything up! Most importantly, it was the word preached by Pastor Kong that moved my heart closer to God! If I had not accepted God earlier..where would I be now? What would I be doing now? There might just be a very high chance that I would be idling my time around and well, hang out late in the night in some unknown places with my friends. Working to spend my weekends might just be another option. Lols.

It is true that money opens up my pathway, such that I will be able to buy things that I have always desired. But, what will the meaning of life be if I just slog my weekends away for the sake of money? Tell me!!!

Alrights, perhaps i should really shut up before I lengthen my post. Hahs.

*Your attitude determines your altitude*

2006-04-08T21:49:00.000+08:00

I finally changed my blogskin! A yummlicious skin! *Evil Laughters!*

I enjoy munching on cookies as much as baking cookies! Hahs.

My last lesson for Victorious Living ended today with a short quiz which I did kinda well. And off I am, aiming for Authority For Victory!

In the midst of the lesson, Brother Eric (who took over Pastor Zhuang because he is away for Taiwan's Emerge) mentioned something that lead me to two drops of tears (one for each eye).

He said that it would be very sad if we do not bring any friend for the coming Easter celebration because the people around us would have missed out a very great chance of listening to the gospel and everything! Personally, I had a 'record breaking' when none of the friends whom I have invited attended last year's Christmas services. A total of 4 services, and yet my friends count is ZERO.

In my heart, I was utterly disappointed. Not in my friends, but myself. I was upset to as why I was unable to think of more friends who could have been free on either the 24th or 25th Dec 2005 to attend Jesus' birthday party. I felt that I could have done more to spread the joy to my friends.

So this year, like what Brother Eric has preached, let me (and us) start doing more for this year's Easter! I visualise my friends coming for a great gathering in Expo Hall 8 next Saturday and Sunday. And I can foresee them walking to the front of the stage! If I can see it, I can have it! For faith does no lies in the things that are seen, but things that are not seen!

This is definitely the best season of the year to invite my friends to church! Because I know that it is on Good Friday that Jesus died on the cross to bear our sins and it is also on Easter that Jesus rose to show everyone who He is!

Jesus brings forth salvation to everyone of us! Without the cross that He had carried up the hill of Calvary, and without he blood which He has shed on the cross, I doubt I will be existing here today!

So for us who are already saved, let us all reach out to those who have yet to hear and SEE what Easter is all about! And for you who have yet to join me for service before, avail yourself and come with me to hear and SEE what Easter is all about!!! =)

2006-04-05T16:03:00.000+08:00

=)

I enjoy being who I am.

2006-04-02T22:14:00.000+08:00

As I was chatting with Jeannie (from Dialect) today, the prophecy that Shannon (my CGL) spoke to me at the first CG meeting of 2006 is beginning to surface.

So now, only Shannon (if she remembers), Jeannie and me know about this particular word which was spoken into my life.

At the first thought when Shannon spoke that word, I was wondering to myself: well, of course that is what God will do. However as she continued, I realised that this time I will be placed in a different spiritual battlefield. And true indeed, I am situated in a place beyond where my mind can ever imagine.

I am moving on!

*Keeping close in prayers is the only way*

1 Samuel 15:22b
".... Behold, to obey is better than sacrifice..."

2006-04-01T23:32:00.000+08:00

The more things go wrong for me, the more I need to hang on!

2006-03-29T20:58:00.000+08:00

No matter how much I try to put on a smile on my face it seems that my eyes always betray me. Yes, the tiredness expressed by the dark rings surrounding my eyes just gave way. My eyes just feel extremly dry and my eyelids are heavy when night falls.

However I personally feel that things are getting better for me in general. I somehow have yet to sleep at any single lecture so far (except the Math lecture on early Monday morning). And yes, I did not drink any coffee. My secret? It is very simple, not only do I put in my best to sleep a little more, but I have also lifted up my lecture sessions intomy Father's hands. Hahs! As simple and easy as that!

I did my visitation today and great things did happen to me! I had a chat with Maria and Wendy who were with me. In my short chat, I forgotten about something very important. I did not take into deep consideration why I suddenly had so many nightmares in the afternoon nap which I took on Monday.

Yes, one of the common reasons people may give is fatigue. It is undeniable that when one is fatigue, the mind is weak and vulnerable to any thoughts that are dominated by fear and shocks. As such, there is a very high possiblity that one's mind may just go wild after going through a level of pressure.

But then again, for someone who hardly dreams, how can it be possible for her to have 3 nightmares in a row? I seldom dream because the moment I lie on my bed each time, I will fall into deep sleep. In addition, I am someone who dreams only like...twice annually? So, let alone me experiencing nightmares in my sleep.

To think further, the main reason why I am disturbed in my nap is because I forgot to pray before I napped. Another contributing factor can be that the devil is trying to scare me off from what I am doing right now! Yes, in Dialect I am learning to grow and am picking up skills to start an estate. The estate has just been opened to the church, and I am learning everything step by step. The devil may stop me, but God will continue to hold and push me on! =)

And I have one piece of great news to share with everyone! I scored 90% for my Integration Lecture test! This is not boasting!!!I would just like to share about God's goodness in my life! You see, I ended school late and had visitation the day before the lecture. The worn out me had little time to study, but one decision I chose correctly was to pray to God and asking for His wisdom! I am practically praying for the wisdom of Daniel to bestow onto me daily!

Daniel has the wisdom ten times that of normal beings! Who would not want that? I want that! And I desire after that for a good cause! I am enjoying every single bit of my life now!

Having completed my 2nd Physics Tutorial since my entry in JJC last year is the 2nd most accomplished thing that I have done this week! God is really great! And He plays a great role in helping me to achieve my resolutions this year!

Moving on!

2006-03-27T20:45:00.000+08:00

I just woke up from the worst afternoon nap I ever had in my lifetime...

I stuggled to sleep so as to rid my headache. To my horror, I ended up starring at the ceiling and not too long after that, my imagination got so wild that I began my series of nightmares. I do feel something wrong with me whenever I sleep but I just am unable to explain that. Somehow I became tired after letting my mind go wild and slowly, I fell into sleep...

Things just did not stop when I slept. I could remember myself doing some unexpected stuff out of nowhere and dreaming of people telling me things which I just cant expect.

I recalled me and my siblings at an unknown high rise place where we said bye to one of my seconday school mates whom I was never close to. It was then late night and I remembered us taking escalators down from a very high place and as we reached the end of one of the escalators, I heard a group of people singing. And my oh my, one of them (a guy) had a very nice and powerful voice.

And all of a sudden, my focus changed and I saw Thomas, my classmate, rushing into the class scolding some awful words. And guess what he spoke? He said that he was super pissed of by Tong Loong(another classmate of mine) who ps him upon passing by a stall selling pirated VCDs. =X It just all seem so weird..Weird and weird. Yes, I got so terrified that I woke up immediately.

Seeing that my room was dark, and the songs kept playing, I thought to myself that I was gone already because the time might be 11+pm then. And yes, I am suppose to hand up a whole lot of homework tomorrow. Lols. And guess what? The time is only 830pm, and I have slept for only two hours...

I am beginning to walk in a different light of my light.. And I feel so insecured..Thoughts are beginning to flood me..

2006-03-27T17:56:00.000+08:00

Take a close look!

Well, that is simply the mess of my table after my Chemistry SPA (in short, practical) today. For once I actually panicked. Perhaps the lack of my preparation serves as the main reason. My hands kept shaking upon using the dropper to drip 5 small little droplets of sulphuric acid. Somehow, I fumbled again and again. I misread the instructions at the beginning and was hinted by my Chemistry tutor.

And as I continued, I broke the glass rod unknowingly while trying to stir my mixture. My precipitate did not appear, but I filtered it and ended up getting another 'cherp' sound from my tutor. So I tried stirring in again by putting my small beaker of solution into a big beaker of ice water. And immediately, white precipitate appeared. =X

Immediately I filtered my precipitate. And it was at that moment do I realised that I have broke my glass rod (aka stirrer) while I tried to stir my solution to make to precipiate appear! Duhs. What a strong lady I am! Hahs

Things just went on for me and somehow my tutor came aiding me time and time again by checking on me. Wah! What great favour from man I have actualli found! Whahaha. Things went really well and I had beautiful crystals at the end of the day. On top of that, I have a rather high yield! Praise God!

Another breakthrough I had today is all thanks to the packet of hot coffee I drank in the morning straight after my Math lecture. I slept through my Math lecture in the morning. To make things worst, I have got a headache which was with me since last night. In fact, I get headaches every night without fail. The lack of sleep contributes to this pain in my head, not my school work!

Alright, I am still experiencing that now.. Arg..

Back to my main point! The breakthrough is that I stayed awake through the Physics lecture today! Yes, this is the first time I 'failed' to sleep in the Physics lecture! And that is simply because of the mighty wonders of the coffee which stopped me from dozing off. One annoying thing is that my Physics tutor actually did not wake up those sleeping beauties in my class in the midst of the lecture!!!! Yes, this is his first time, and my first time! My beloved Physics tutor, Mr Oh, never fails to wake me up in the midst of each lecture whenever I doze off. And today!! Just today!! He did not come and wake up my classmates! Lols! You guys are just so lucky! Hahs. Now I am having second thoughts to as whether I am actually a 'prominent' student to Mr Oh. =X

And off I go! :D

2006-03-26T22:25:00.000+08:00

I have a wonderful, amazing miracle working God!

I am simply much more amazed and marvelled at His works! Tears just kept flowing down my from my eyes whenever I heard how God has moved mightily in the lives of His children. I aspire to be the one standing on stage telling people how much God has changed me...

2006-03-22T21:52:00.000+08:00

Words, words and more words! Aint you getting tired of reading words? =D

I am not tired, neither am I sick of typing them out! In fact, I enjoy typing and reading words!

Once again, doing is a much more challenging task as compared to saying. I have typed so much about me gearing up for a challenging future and me going to overcome every obstacle in my life gloriously, but how much have I done so far?

Despite mentioning so much, and putting in as much effort as I am able to at this moment, I personally feel that I am prepared for only 1.00% of the upcoming events in my life!

After giving myself a reflection regarding what happened today, I nearly broke down! Oops, I mean I broke down! Though it was just a minor one, I just cannot imagine how I would be like in the future when everything starts to progress intensively.

True indeed, I no longer can depend on my own will to ensure daily survival. I definitely need God to expand my capacity. To handle every single thing on my hand seem a little impossible but all I can do now is to lift everything up in my Father's hand.

With only 24 hours a day, and 7 days a week, I have to:
-Visit elderly at their homes
-Start getting involved for POS
-Complete my schoolwork promtly
-Attend school daily (One of my top new year resolutions!)
-Get ready for Dialect service weekly
-Be prepared for Cell Group (matters)
-Study for my weekly class/lecture test
-Try my very best to spend time with my classmates after school
-Prepare Easter props for the drama team in Dialect

To man, all these seem impossible. But, I am really putting total faith into every single matter. I do not know how, but I will just believe that God will straighten the path for me. I simply enjoy every task I am involved in! If not I would not have volunteered myself for everything! Hahs. So if you are a friend of mine, keep me going on by encouraging me instead of hindering my progress! =)

My purpose of blogging such a matter is to bring to light to people how tight my schedule can actually get at times and as such, some people around me are affected. Over here, I would like to apologise to some people for not being able to spend time with them this period of time. These people are:

-Sharon: I am so sorry to have turned down your invitations again and again. But I will definitely put in my very best to spend time with you when things have settled down.

-Patricia, Xin Yu and the great class of 4E1: It seems that I have broken my promise to organise a class outing in December and March. I would like to seek for your forgiveness yea? =)

-My CG members: It seems that I have always been absent in whatever shopping/movies trips of you people! But I have given my word to spend one day out with you all on Sunday! So let's all choose a date before everything intensifies for me!

-S6. Especially to Guan Bao Ying! Despite us meeting up for less than 5 times annually, I still feel the warmth among us! Thanks infinity for everything that you all have sown in my life. And for Bao Ying, ps to reject your offers again and again! But nonetheless, you're still remembered in my heart at all times! This goes to the rest too!

-05S19-ians: It seems that I have been missing out lunchs at JP with you peeps huh? But I promise to make my presence felt over there whenever time permits! Go go go! And hey! We have all improved in the Chemistry test as compared to the previous one! Great job everyone! Let's all go towards the finishing line with all our might in unity!

-In any case I have missed out anyone, do feel free to add them in the tag because it seems a little hard for me to recall everyone at this instant! Hahs.

*Expand my capacity like never before...*

2006-03-20T21:35:00.000+08:00

My new timetable is great! Genearally, school ends at around 2pm daily! Weeh! I am enjoying myself!!!

And yes, I am gearing up myself for a greater future! Hahs

2006-03-18T23:27:00.000+08:00

Great!

You readers are simply Amazing, Awesome, Incredible and Fantastic! I understand that a great load of your time will always be taken up when reading my entries because my entries are generally long! Hahs.

Just by the simple four words or more, I believe that everyone who hears that will be so pleased and confident of himself/herself! And of course, genuine words are the most precious of all.

Living in this fallen world definitely makes the spoken words of the people around us doubtous. At times you might just be wondering if your closest friend is genuine in opening up his/her life to you. People can say alot, but do they mean as much as what they've spoken? Truth lies only in the speakers, not the hearers.

Having lived on this world for a whole of 17.5 years, I find myself on the path of exploring various groups of people existing on earth.

Having entered a new phase of my life last year, I discovered myself engaging with people who were at least 50% different from my secondary school mates. I can assure you that none of the friends I have in JJ is similar in personality to my seconary school mates. Naturally, great challenges were posed to me as I set my heart to build relationships with my current classmates.

And at the same time, I have had friends who proceeded to other JCs and ploytechnics. Having heard about what they experienced in their new campus have opened me to the world. I have heard and even seen the changes people made in order to adapt to their new environment. Some good and some bad, but nonetheless, every matter that occurred within my circuation of my friends has brought to light several issues in my life.

For many things, control seems to be beyond our reach and slowly temptations start to conquer our lives whereby we start to yield to our carnal desires instead of keeping close to the moral and/or disciplined principalities that we have set/ought to have.

It takes a nobody to give in to the temporary temptations but a somebody to conquer the obstacles. You become a nobody the moment you view yourself as someone who has lost control and starts to admit defeat over issues in life. However, I believe that everyone, including a nobody, can be transformed into a somebody. Just a very simple step is required: You just have to keep focusing on your finishing line and let no distraction stop your journey the moment you walk pass the starting point.

I am sure that the devil will come up with something funny to deal with us whenever we set our hearts to accomplish a certain matter. But I can assure each and everyone of us is able to defeat the devil by every single solution that we have. A problem will not be a problem if it does not has a solution! Problem and solution/s come together! So be assured that you are able to hold the bannar of victory each time you meet with a problem!

Hey, I see you as a somebody in my life! =)

2006-03-16T22:59:00.000+08:00

I know that my coming days are going to be challenging... A hectic schedule is up but I am not going to be defeated by it! I am do all things gloriously with my God Who has made me more than an overcomer! Weeh!

2006-03-16T22:51:00.000+08:00

I've learnt something today! Something that is positive and beneficial in my daily life! Yeah, I got to get in touch with the 'art' of knowing how someone's life has been changed! Weeh! This is 'chimalogy'! Hahs.

I am just so excited for my tomorrows in life! My days have never been the same since I got to know Jesus! I am part of His adventure! Go! Go! Go!!!

*People do not care about how much you know till they know how much you care!*

2006-03-14T23:46:00.000+08:00

HELLO to ALL!

I am just so hyped up! My mind has start 'working'! That is simply because several thought provoking issues creeped into my ears went I met up with S6. (S6 = Sisters 6 which is a group formed by my very close friends of whom includes Bao Ying, Xiang Ying, ME, Adeline, Melissa and Cherisa.) I reckon many of you will know who these people are except for a few who have been with me through my secondary years. Hahs

I must admit that certain issues are very sensitive and controversial. My heart sank when I heard them talking about how some of our common friends are doing now. Some may have move on for a better life but it is also undeniable that some have made some careless moves that may affect their future.

Upon leaving with Adeline, we touched on those issues which were discussed earlier by S6. We agreed that people do change. And for many things in life, there will always be a first time for many of us. Many controversies arose simply because of the timings of which our first times occured.

Let's take the age when you learnt to cycle as an example. Imagine yourself as a 25-year old person now who is on a cycling trip with your group of friends whom you have just known. Many would have assumed you as a cyclist simply because you are out there on a cycling trip with them. But what do you think their reponses would be like if you were to tell them that you do not know how to cycle? Human instinct is that you were joking with them because as a 25 years old human being, it seem so impossible that you are a non cyclist, especially when you have agreed to go on a cycling trip!

For many things, when it occur at a right timing many people will keep silent and be glad that you have somehow attempted something new in your life. However, if your first time occurs at the wrong time, I believe that critics will start to comment endlessly. So do always remember to do things at the right time and right place! =)

Despite bringing certain unpleasant matters to light, I still enjoyed my chill out with S6 today! Weeh! You guys are simply the greatest!

I left them early to attend a coaching session for Spelling Bee competition today. Well, the session was certainly interesting and somewhat enjoyable though my energy was drained out in the later part of the session. I have definitely learnt something from that session. All I can say for those who have gave the session a miss is that you guys have missed the opportunity to learn something which may just benefit you in the future in the long run! Hahs.

*I can control my time! And I can make a difference by controlling my time wisely! =) *

2006-03-12T23:48:00.000+08:00

My mind seems to have stop thinking about the 'whys' of this world. Or maybe, my mind is spinning around this world so quickly that it just cannot afford to stop and look at the happenings of my surrounding.

Every single second is either work or rest. Thinking has ceased as my favourite and daily activity. And I feel so lost...

No time, no entertainment, no no and more nos!

Hahs. Alright, my grumbling shall end here! And here!

It seems that I am going to disappear in the realm of blogging soon. Somehow and somewhat.

*Going and going..*

2006-03-08T16:34:00.000+08:00

I broke my promise not to 'pon' school!!!!!!

Yea, that will be the greatest issue of this year. I do not intend to speak this out loudly but I feel kinda disaapointed with what I have done.

The main reason to my disappearance in schoool yesterday was due to today's Chemistry test. I failed to start my revision on Monday after school because I was trying my best to attempt Tuesday's Chemistry Tutorial. The NMR (Nuclear Magnetic Resonance) Spectroscopy chapter is forcing me to pull out my hair! Hahs. I was just cracking a cold joke! Well, I revised through the topic and did the tutorial (only 2 questions) for 4 hours!

Perhaps that was really what I had to suffer for dozing off in all the NMR lectures over the past 3 weeks since the beginning! I regret it! T_T..

Due to this particular topic, I did not manage to bang on Chemistry revision. Feeling desperate, I decided to give myself a day of 'rest' and made full use of my time. Well, I did study and most importantly, I had a good rest in the afternoon when I took a nap after my revision of all the topics in the morning.

What exactly happened was simply due to a lack of good time management I would say. In the very beginning, I should have started my revision on Saturday as I had challenged myself. However to my disappointment, I spent my whole Saturday afternoon doing my Math tutorial and assignment! And on Sunday, I did the overdued Physics Test 2 at home after asking for a week's rest from Dialect Ministry.

Okie! I am off to do my Math assignment and the overly dued revision exercise which was given to me more than two weeks ago!!! Go Go Go!

*Hope lies not in the hands of the people around us, but the beholder's hands. You own your future not others.*

2006-03-05T22:21:00.000+08:00

I finally am able to settle down and read the blog entries of the people around me. It certainly warms up my heart when I read about how my friends are doing in their daily lives!

I read Willy's recent entry and it certainly touches my heart because I know that he has given his best and the fullest attention he can ever provide in writing a wonderful heart to heart entry. Most importantly, he has great courage in displaying his genuine thoughts. In fact, if the chance ever occurs, Ms Lang (our Civics Tutor) should really read the entry and start to understand Willy.

Like Willy, most of our classmates have been feeling down the moment school work is mentioned. Everyone seems to feel so dead and tired upon reaching home daily without even touching the work assigned. To make things worst, teachers do make remarks that stresses us to the extreme. By repeating our under performance level time and time again is no differance from nagging.

Nagging is definitely NOT advicing. Who will ever enjoy listening the nags of a someone? Advices certainly sound much more pleasant and appetizing.

Anyway, no matter what you, you and you (the reader) are going through, I believe that there would have been someone in this world undergoing what you are experiencing. You see, people undergoes such challenges and survived! So can you! Afterall, we are all human beings and we all came from the same creator; God!

In my previous entries, I admit to typing my thoughts out harshly. And somehow I have grabbed the attention of many closed and loved ones around me. I thank all for the love and concern that have been bestowed on me. I am speechless for all the things that you all have done for me.

After typing those entries, and having experienced the endless concern poured onto me, I felt as though I am a vulnerable little girl. There are times where I was dumbfounded when people start to comment that they know that I am very stressed due to my packed schedule and everything. Yes, all of a sudden, I feel kinda useless because I have appeared as someone who has lost management of her time and has made a mess out of everything that was assigned to her.

And that was not what I wanted to convey initially. Please pardon me!

What I did a few days ago on this blog account was perhaps an alternative for me to vent my fustrations over my untouched school work load and lack of time management. And I was not trying to imply to anyone that I would like to sacrifice any of the things that I am currently holding on to.

I love and enjoy what I am doing currently because I know that through what I have contributed, someone has definitely be blessed. This is not over confidence, but rather a sense of assurance which I have deposited in my heart and mind as I conduct my activites.

And I see no need in people trying to encourage me by asking me to give up something that has already been integrated into my life. I understand that these people have given me advices/solutions as a way of showing their concern and even helping me to carry my burden but that is simply not the way I think.

Basically my life revolved around the activites relating to church other than my school connections. So it is definitely common sense that what people around me have been asking to do is to let go of my activites temporary or well..even permanantly if I happen to forget about it in the future.

I want to give my life to my Saviour because He, Jesus Christ, was nailed on the cross some 2000 years ago just to redeem my life and let me reunite with my Father in heaven. Jesus Christ came to earth humbly and shed His precious blood on a cross despite being the Son of our Father in heaven.

If Jesus despite being the Son of God has laid down His precious life for a sinful me in the past, all the more the little me should give up my life willingly for Him... This is my expression of love for Him.

*I will be away for some time before I return back to www.crappi.blogspot.com Hahs*

2006-03-05T06:49:00.000+08:00

A big No No!

I am not going to be pressed down! Yeap, I confess in the name of my God that I will be strengthen by Him and be able to overcome all things, especially the impossible!

And yes! I am going to have a great day today!

*What a beautiful sunday morning I have!*

2006-03-03T13:19:00.000+08:00

For once in my life, I actually had 'Friday' blues. I seriously am unable to describe how bad and wrong things can actually be for me today! But thank God I gave sufficient time to calm myself down this morning before I broke down. Woosh! Praise God!

Practically everyone in the class has given the Chinese Tourism Lecture a miss. So here I am, at home taking a rest to refresh myself before returning back to the school to attend a crash course by SCDF. I do hope that I will refresh and renew my mind ASAP before CGM starts tonight! Weeh!

*Time is what I need.*

2006-03-03T00:13:00.000+08:00

M.I.A

Time is running after me so tightly that I hardly am able to find a moment to rest. Work and more work is coming from the diligent and full of love teachers from JJC who hope that we are able to graspe a better understanding of every single topic/module they are teaching/ have taught. I am seriously feeling the stretch in my life..

My proportionality of elasticity seem so small that I might just break down any moment. I feel the pressure to perform well so as not to disappoint my parents the way I did for my 'O' Levels. I feel the intensity at this moment..

~Speechless~

2006-02-25T21:46:00.000+08:00

It feels so great to have blogged once again! To me, this blog account is a place for me to express my views somewhat freely. Most importantly, my aim of this blog is to impact people who read my entries. A blog entry should be more than a report of your daily life...

I went to a hawker centre beside Boon Lay Shoppng Centre to have my dinner with my father and siblings. On the way there, he asked if we would like to have Nasi Lemak despite me telling him how much I want to stay away from Nasi Lemak earlier on while we were at Bugis. He was giving praises to the Nasi Lemak stall, and somehow my sister just had the itch to eat it. To her disappointment, the stall was closed! Hahs. But to our amazement, on the way back to the carpark after finishing our meal and our trip to a nearby NTUC, we witness a queue outside the famous Nasi Lemak stall before it even opens up for business. The queue was approximately 7 to 10 metres long. Do not ask me why the stall opens so late because I have aboslutely no idea! Hahs. But, I realised one thing: the food must be very nice, if not it would not attract a bee of people over there even before its opening hours! So you all who love Nasi Lemak should really go over there!

I have just finished a report which I have to hand in for Dialect Ministry. Well, some things were screwed up last weekend and I have to bear part of the responsibility and give a clear account of everything. My time IS so tight that I actually brought my laptop out and typed the report on the way to fetch my mother home. And now, I still have tonnes of homework to complete! To make things worst, I just cannot answer the tutorial questions correctly! This certainly frustrates me to the extreme! Arg! I need more of God's understanding and wisdom to be with me! Pray, pray and pray!

*And off I go! See me soon in two days' time! That's the earliest I can guarantee =) *

2006-02-23T15:00:00.000+08:00

Greetings to everyone! I am still smiling and giggling whever I can! Hahs. I must really say well done to all JC graduates who have survived the 'A' Levels. After reading my friends' blogs and seeing the faces of my classmates daily, I can depict their stress level. To make things worse, problems belonging to the heart keep appearing in the lives of my close friends. These problems doesnt necessart refer to the BGR kinda stuff I would say because I think many of my classmates are too busy for that. But, the lost of valuable; important objects have surfaced among my classmates. I would not mention much but one thing I know is that all these events are unpredictable. We, not only you, must all learn from all these lessons.

As a friend, I may not be in your shoes experiencing what you are going through now, but I can assure you that I understand how you feel. As a normal being, I am certain that what you are going through now is either something I have been through it or am going to face in the near future. You see, nothing is ever new under the sun. So I believe that when you feel that you are going to be driven crazy by the stuff revolving in your life, there might actually be someone out there who is waiting for you to share your problems, carry your burden and even be there to bring you through this moment of 'crisis'.

I am just that someone, waiting for everyone to regard me as someone part of their life... It does not matter who I am, but what I am to you does really matter.

Building up trust with someone is tough and it requires time. It is just like my relationship with my Father in heaven. When I just accepted Him in my life, I find it hard to pray to Him and to share with Him the problems and worries of my life. But as time passes by, and as I begin to build an intimate and trusting relationship with Him, things changed! My life brightens up and all of a sudden, I am learning to open up to the people around me! Yesterday, I finally had my Quiet Time after a long battle with my daily tiredness. I had it not because I stopped feeling tire yesterday, but it was because I planned my time and the things that I would like to do the moment I reached home from school.

As I spoke in tongues, I began to share with Him the issues of my life. The next moment I realised was that I could not stop sharing with Him! I just talked and talked. For one time do I realised that I actually have got so many problems in my life, but surprisingly, I did not express my sorrows outwardly in front of others. Praises should all really go to my Father in heaven who have strengthened me every day and helping me to conquer one mountain after another.

I have lightened my burden and one thing is that I felt so secure in my life when I walk with Jesus. Life is no longer filled with uncertainty for me because Jesus Christ is there to be the solution for me in every situation I face!

One example is my Math Vectors lecture test today. Frankly speaking, vectors is a very dangerous topic in my point of view. The chances of you making a mistake in every few steps of working is just so high! On top of that, questions can be twistered easily hence making everything tricky! I am not trying to exaggerate how tough this topic is but rather, I am expressing my areas of weakness in this topic.

I was extremly worried yesterday for myself because this test seemed like a killer to me. And just last week, I failed a spring test for Vectors. I was so worried that I kinda broke down while sharing my problems with God. But the more I chatted with me, I felt my worries diminishing, and the next moment, I started to tell God that I believe that I will do well. And that as I do my paper, all formulae will come back into my mind calmly. I even prayed for a 90% A grade!

I do plan and pray over my plans. For every test, I lifted it all up to God and asked that God's grace will help me to achieve an A grade with a certain percentage. In my pevious Math and Chem test, God did wonders for me by allowing me to As. Wow. And today, everything just went so smoothly for me. I could do all the questions and felt kinda assured in my answers. Let's all wait for the good news that God has done in my life!

One of my new year resolutions is to be prompt in handing up my work. I am somewhat reaching there. I am going to hang on! =)

*Yippee ya ya yippee yippee ya!*

2006-02-21T21:40:00.000+08:00

Tonnes of homework is waiting for me! Wosh..I need to take a breather.. Woo Ah Woo Ah..

Hahs. I have never expected JC2 to be so hectic for me. And now, I am really trying bit by bit to be on task for my work though I am lagging behind by a little. Off I go!!

*If you love me, and you care for me as a friend, say a prayer for me because I love you too! And I have prayed for you! =) *

2006-02-18T21:48:00.000+08:00

Finally I went to have a dip in the swimming pool this afternoon. I have not swam since the last 2004's Emerge conference where I was required to.. Hahs.

The weather was fabulous this afternoon! And the moment I step out of the swimming complex (NOT swimming pool) it rained! Hahs. What really mattered was that I finally had the chance to fellowship with my sister! The fellowship was great and I know that God is really working in my life in the area of my relationship with her.

Through our conversation I realised one very important truth. Ever since I accepted Christ Jesus as my LORD and Saviour, I have received tremendous grace from Him and favour from the people around me! You see, things went really well for me in secondary school. As an out spoken person in class, no one really objected to any of my speeches which I had for with the teachers.

For example, I used to be the first to comment about the heavy homework load of the class and would often request from them to reduce it, and surprisingly, many supported me. Hahs. That does not seem to be a very strong support. The other one I remembered clearly was in 2003 when our SS (Social Studies) teacher asked if we would like to order the Giordano's 'I love Singapore' T-shirt. Knowing that the T-shirt was awful, I immediately told her to save her effort because no one would want to order that T-shirt without even asking for the class' opinions. It came to me very sudden that everyone kept quiet and nodded their head. Woah! But in the end I got a trashing from her for being not supportive of my country's national day stuff and etc and she even commented me for being rude to have made that comment without seeking the thoughts of my classamtes. LOLS! Despite of all my mischievious acts and the many scoldings I got from many teachers, I still enjoyed my 2003 then. Hahs

In Sec 4, I remembered how my class supported me in whatever activities I organised. We had a unsuccessful BBQ at West Coast Park in the June holidays, and I tried holding another BBQ in Dec despite the failure. Surprisingly most of them turned up and kinda enjoyed themselves! Hahs. This was the kind of support they gave to me when I was still back in TSS! What great friends I have!

Now in JJC my classmates are the ones who brighten up my day when I am tired. They are the pushing forces for me to attend lectures and lessons which start in afternoon. On top of that, they are kinda entertaining too! Hahs.

I continued chatting with my sister and many stuff were brought to light today. I brought myself into the realm of thoughts. And all of a sudden I got a revelation in the midst of Pastor Zhuang's preaching earlier on at the combined CGM, Ignite.

A person who keeps learning the WOG (word of God) but do not apply it in their lives, even after a period of time, is like a seed that is frequently moistured, exposed to the sunlight and fed with quality fertiliser and yet does not grow. How is that possible when the required conditions are already present? It is simple, because the seed is dead! That explains why it does not even sprout out when quality conditions are provided! Dear friends, if you are not applying the WOG which you have learnt in your life, and are often hard headed to the feedback of others- refusing to heed the advice others give you and do not ponder about why people comment about your specific areas- you make no difference from a dead seed!

It hurts me alot to see people wearing a mask in front of people of higher authority and revealing their 'demonic' self to others around them. I can tell you that such burdens my heart even though these people whom I know are not close to me. The one thing I can do is to pray for them..

*Praying continually..*

2006-02-17T23:37:00.000+08:00

Everything's simply going great for me daily though certain activities do drain my energy.

School is getting fun for me as I enjoy myself more and more in the company of my friends. Hilarious stuff just keep happening for no reason! Hahs. I do enjoy seeing the laughters of my classamtes and it certainly bring joy to me whenever they smile and get together for a time of fun!

Just in case you guys are not sure, as a CCA-less student in JJC, my only friends are a few church mates, a few OG mates whom I am 'close' to and my classmates. It sounds kinda pathetic as compared to the vast connections of friends I used to have back in Tanglin Sec., but I do not mind. Afterall, I am able to keep my focus in building wonderful relationships with my beloved classmates instead of widely distributing my time to go about spending minimum time I can with every single one. After quality matters more than quantity! Hahs!

I seem to be getting tired easily nowadays. The moment the clock strucks 10.00pm, my eyelids will start to shut. I am really glad that I finally have the chance to hug my bed for more than 8 hours tomorrow! It seems ages since I last laid on my bed for more than 8 hours!!! Hahs.I am certainly looking forward to a peaceful sleep! Yippee!

Reading a book is not my habit. I take more time to finish reading a book as compared to others. Since the beginning of the year till now, I have finally completed 2/3 of the 'big girls dont whine' book. I admit that I have learn alot just by reading that book. It helps to set the platform for me to mature my mindset and how I should respond in critical situations and etc. I am definitely enjoying the book! And I will complete it! Yeah!

~~~Lalala~~~

2006-02-15T16:16:00.000+08:00

Sweet belated Valentine's greetings to all! =)

Hahs. I was busy mugging the moment I reached home yesterday...

I had a great celebration early in the morning yesterday with my classmates after our PC (aka PE). Many of them were sweet to have gotten little gifts for me and the rest of our classmates. A bunch of guys from my class were the greatest of all! They ordered flowers for every single lady in my class! And of course, that included me! Hahs. Things were as pernormal later in the day. However we did not feel dreadful in any way though our lessons end only at 4pm every Tuesday. Hahs. And after school, majority of us missed the opportunity to celebrate that special day together due to the 'major' Chemistry test today.

It was rather history breaking when my Chemistry tutor, Mr Azmi, applauded us for our 10th position as a class in the whole J2 Chemistry cohort in the previous test. And with that elated news, we unofficially announced that we are aiming to be ranked top five today's test. It was rather interesting because my class has been well known for its playfulness last year. Our results were not great either and often, we are the top 10 from the bottom. But those are all history! I am glad that we have had a great start in our Chemistry and are all so enthusiastic to achieving our goals in this test.

It all started when Thomas, my classmate, said that we should all work hard for the top 5 positions. Initially I thought that was just a passing remark of his since he has always been playful, but never did I know that everyone took it seriously and mugged hard for today's paper. No one objected to us working hard together in going toward our goal. I am touched by that. Things are seriously great in my class! And, I mean my class, not JJC yeA? Hahs.

I do not care how JJC is progressing because I have never like anything much about this college. Rather, it is 05S19 that I love!

Alright, I am going to get everyone in for a belated V day's celebration this Friday after our excursion in Chinatown! Hahs. Wait! I am not excited over the Chinese tourism course that requires us to make a trip to Chinatown and Little India. But it is our class gathering that I olook forward to!

To end this, I want to thank everyone who have played a part in brightening up my day yesterday, including my dentist when I went for my appointment. Lols. Btw, today's Chemistry test was smooth sailing for me in general though I have made a big mistake by leaving a question that constitutes 10% of the marks. Nonetheless, I really would like to give my greatest appreciation and thanks to all those who have kept me close in their prayers yesterday and even days before that! =) On top of al these people, God is who I want to give praises to! Wonderful miracle working God! =)

*If you believe, you will achieve.*

2006-02-13T21:23:00.000+08:00

My classmates have always liked to ask me this question: Why are you always so busy? Have to rush away straight after school to settle your stuff...

Hahs. I admit that I normally leave the school in a rush the moment the last school bell for me goes off. But there are times when time is really running tight for me, and that explains why I hardly stay back for late lunches at JP with them. But nowadays, I do try my best to be part of their group whenever I feel that I can. But nonetheless, I still fail to make full use of my time when I am home. On top of all these, I seldom sleep sufficiently and I certainly hate this kinda feeling to the core! Arg...

Hahs. Anyway, I am just blogging out of fun. Hehs. Off I go to settle my work! Weeh!

2006-02-12T23:01:00.000+08:00

My future lies in my hand. Likewise the way I behave depends on the way I think.

I know that at times I am straight forward in my speech and words and have hurt people who heard those words without me knowing it. I am sorry for that. But I do not deny that I do speak the facts at times. Facts are afterall, sometimes cruel. We just cannot change that way facts present themself. However, facts can be viewed differently by various people. Whether something is viewed good or bad ultimately lies in the hands of the seer.

I can say alot, but my words will bring me to nothing if no action is carried out. Today, I do not want to present myself through words, but rather by my acts. A greater period of transition is waiting for me...

Wendy from Dialect Church (DC) commented on my blog entry regarding the stuff going on in my class. I agreed partially to what she spoke to me while serving today and on the tagboard. However, I still reserve part of my views despite what others say. But, my opinions are based on the facts which I witnessed to.

I listened to the testimony of the CG member and I aspire to be like the CG member whom she has mentioned. A JC lady (we are not longer girls please!) whom faced somewhat the same situation that I am in now and how she managed to experience a breakthrough in her class and CG in the number of friends.

At the end of the day, God is not going to look at what we owe in life when we all reach heaven, the only thing He finds in our heart is just one word: Faithfulness. I will always keep in mind how God spoke to Shannon about me during CGM. Yes, in this coming year, God is going to test me of my faithfulness, and I am going to step out of my comfort zone to serve Him.

In BS, I have learnt that our faithfulness can be seen through our fruitfulness. And well, I mean being fruitful in the area where you have been faithful in. =)

*I certainly need more understanding and courage to go about solving situations in my life..*

2006-02-11T22:05:00.000+08:00

God's wonderful. I do not inforce my faith onto other people around me, but I do feel kinda disappointed when my friends start telling me that they love God, that they want to attend church but yet they are not willing to attend any church to know God even more, to understand God more and be taught to love God more than you are doing now...

You see, I should not be disappointed at all, because it was not my blood that was shed on the cross on Calvary some 2000 years ago. Instead, the blood was willing shed by Jesus Christ, God's own Son!

And now, I want to make a new commitment to myself that I wan to love God more, to apply the knowledge that has been passed down to me. I need to crucify my flesh. For countless times, I have been compromising with God. And I certainly do not feel comfortable with it. It is my responsibility to meditate this to myself!

Oh yes, I am speaking to myself. But hey, at least I am sharing my views in the aspect of my daily life! =) God, I am running back now!! Catch me!

*Compromise and you will suffer its consequences!*

2006-02-09T17:10:00.000+08:00

I want that O2 PDA!! It's so cool and wah!! It's the phone that will not go out of trend! Hahs..

http://seemightyatom.com/

2006-02-09T16:50:00.000+08:00

For once I am troubled by my friends in school. It has been long time since my secondary school days where I got misunderstood and lost the company of my close friends except for my dearest Melissa Yeo. Oh well, that seemed ages ago! And I am glad that everything is cleared and it's fine for everyone now! =)

All I feel is that the hatred for a particular someone in my class is getting more and more intense. Many times, I do feel sympathise her till an extent. I also tried speaking up for her in the bus today as we got involved in the topic regarding her. But it all seems to me that... ...It will be tough for the rest of the class to get on good terms with her. Afterall, no one in our class is really in any form of close relationship with her.

I personally have not experienced much 'attacks' from her but she seems like a nice and harmless classmate. However, there are many things which I do not understand and it seem to me that everyone is blaming her for her 'legalistic' acts in school when she sometimes hardly set a good (ideal) example for us.

Everything started last year the moment school term started for me in JJ. The tension felt by everyone seems to be an accumulated one. Now, even my bubbly Yun Jie, and all forgiving and gentle Angeline and Pei Yin do not seem to really be able to get along with her... I am all so confused. I want to help her. Giving her a new chance and helping her to understand the classmates better is what I desire. But, how should I go about doing it?

My acts to help her will certainly sparked gossips and even tension between me and my friends. It certainly risks my own freedom in school. I need some guidance!

*My mind's so filled with the worldly problems! Shugs!*

2006-02-08T15:33:00.000+08:00

Everyone seemed so restless in school today. Somehow, my classmates did not laugh much, and I did nothing much in school today. I see most of the people struggling to attend lectures and lessons today. And to me, this did not seem to be the case for my class. Hey, I did not mean that my classmates and me enjoy lectures and tutorials alot. But what I was refering is the atmosphere which my classmates usually have while walking to venues for lessons.

I missed school yesterday as I was sick and headed to see my specialist. But little would I know that so much had happened in a single day that I have missed out. More than half of my class skipped the brilliant GP module idea which the GP department of JJC has came up since I do not know when. In this plan which they have thought of, students are allowed to choose a topic which they are most interested in out of all the choices provided. They would then evaluate the response of the students and group students from various classes into a single class of about 20+ people for a 2-hour tutorial.

At the end all of day, students are still required to attend all the module choices given by the teachers. The thing thing that differs is that time which we take the course! The GP combined class, to me, is a lame waste of time. A stack of notes is bought during our first lesson and everything the teacher-in-charge did and said were practically straight from the notes! The teacher whom we are assigned to are often no difference from a stranger to many of us. As a result, not much communication occurs during the 2-hour lesson. I do not know what your view point is, but I personally feel that it will be much better to interact with my own GP tutor than a 'stranger'! Hahs

Alright, it should be time for me to divert my topic before any controversy strucks in the GP department! Hahs.

School is still a challenging place for me to be in. No, I am not worry about the results orientated society in JJ, or even in Singapore. I am just challenged to be on task in the assignments given to me. The work load seems much more than what I used to have last year! On top of all these, I still have to handle things that are going on simultaneously in my life. In the bible, God says that I am the head and not the tail! And so, I believe that I will be able to be on task in my work ASAP! Let's say, by this week? Hahs. =)

I went home with Jian Chao and Jie Sheng (my classamtes) today. Due to the lack of seats in the bus, Jie Sheng sat at a seat quite a distance away from me and Jian Chao. I began chatting with Jian Chao to see how yesterday was. The conversation was then once again on the hot topic in our class, i.e. the ponning of GP module yesterday. Just in case you wonder why it is such a hot topic, it is because the teacher-in-charge of a particular class which 8 of my classmates are in discovered the truancy of some classmates and reported that issue to our GP tutor and CTs who were shocked and raging after receiving the news.

I asked Jian Chao if he skipped the class yesterday and he replied no. He told me that his module, Science and Religion, was interesting. And yesterday the class watched a clip on the Adam and Eve. Big bang theories like Adam and Eve were created through a period of evolution were given as conclusions of our existence. He asked me what I had to say and I strongly disagreed which such a big bang thoery. Big bang thoeries are no different from conclusions drawn by man after much thinking and assumption without hard evidence. I told him that it is God who created them. Whether man believe in God, the creator of man, or big bang theories depends alot on his belief.

If Adam and Eve were to really be created through evolution, why then do you not see anything transforming from one species to another over a period of more than 4 thousand years ever since Abraham lived? And if you really do believe in evolution, do you believe that human beings can be tansformed into something else just as many have believed that monkeys are the 'ancestors' of us? To me, big bang theories are no different from myths made up by human beings who want to satiate their curiousity.

What an argumental point I have over here. Hahs

*Back to my work now... =) *

2006-02-07T23:38:00.000+08:00

I boarded a bus today and the moment I found a seat, I started to heard a little girl singing. She sang throughout my journey on the bus. After finishing a song, she asked her maid, who was with her to bring her home, if she sang well. Before her maid could feedback, she started singing again. And this occurred for as long as I was on the bus. She was enthusiastic and was moving up and down as she sang.

One thing I love about her is that she sang non stop, proclaiming the lyrics of the song loudly on the bus and she enjoys wha she was doing. And you know what? She was singing kids' songs created for the Lord. I heard words like 'Jesus You are my light'. I felt so much at peace.

At the moment, I realised why Jesus in Matthew 19:14 'But Jesus said, "Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven." '

We should let little children surround our lives as they begin to bring praises to The Lord with all their heart. In Matthew 18: 3-5, Jesus mentioned about us being children, who should be humble. Being a children is what Jesus want us to be: To be fearful of Him, not daring to do things that are against His will. And at the same time, love Him with all our heart, mind and soul without any distractions from the world.

I want to be like that little girl who proclaims her faith in Christ Jesus loudly, not afraid of any criticism.. And also to love God will all I can.

2006-02-06T18:00:00.000+08:00

Hi everyone! Hahs

Oh yes, I am feeling just so great! (Though I am dead tired!) Just wanna share with you all what has been going on in my mind currently...

I have just 'embarked' on a book titled 'big girls dont whine' by Jan Silvious. It was my birthday gift, but I only had the time to start on it recently. Hahs. Aftering reading several chapters, I have certainly learnt countless wonderful things!

One of the things which not only apply to me but also to everyone out there in the world is that as a big girl, one will know what she is called to and what she is good at. Unless she is called to do something, it would be unnecessary to try to strengthen and train yourself in an area which you are weak and are not called to. For example, unlike my sister Sarah, I myself am not very good at singing. She sings well, but knowing that I am not called to be a singer, I should just sing the way I am doing now and strengthen the areas which I am called to be doing.

Knowing what you are called to, and what you should do are very important. It will saves time and bring you straight to where you should be instead of wasting your time and money!

Okie, I shall stop this. hahs! Off I go to study! Lols

2006-02-04T06:53:00.000+08:00

My mind's so filled with the events that are happening around me!

Provoking thoughts are inevitable since I have a well working mind. Hahs. For many times, deep inside my mind I would ponder deeply over an act of someone or an incident with lotsa conclusions for myself. But I seldom share them. I will never know how offensive those remarks I made will be since I am not the one whom I have pondered upon. I admit that I am not perfect, and I do self reflections occasionally. It does work in making a better person as a learn from one lesson to the other.

But that is not what I intended to blog on!

I had a wonderful CGM last night and before that, a walk around Telok Blangah was certainly great! During CGM, I felt that God was speaking to me through Shannon. The words that flowed out from her seemed to be what God was telling me! I mean, it somewhat applies in my life!

On our very first CGM of 2006, I remembered Shannon praying for every individual who attended CGM. Her prayers for me was the shortest of all that she had said for me. Though short, the prayer was impactful.

I want to bring my relationship with God to a higher level, but there are certain times when I get defeated by the devil. I gave in, and lost the battle. You see, attacks by the devil is appearing at every moment. I keep telling myself that I want to do this or that, but it somewhat never did come to pass due to my complacency.

As I thought about all these, the word faithfulness came rushing back to me. Shannon prayed for me and mentioned that this year is going to be a tough year for me because God is going to test on my faithfulness!

Everyone knows that God is the one whom we will praise and whom we want to be with when things are going well for us. But the question is how many of you will cling on to God and continue to believe in His promises when things start going haywire?

In your darkest moment, it is inevitable that you will start to doubt God. I am sure the devil will make use of that opportunity to shake your faith!

Even for me personally, I have been tempted by the devil in several areas.

Things are moving in a different dimension for me this year. It seem to be a total different one. I cant bring it out through words. But God is the best witness I am able to find. I am beginning to do things which I have never though I can. I felt so stretched, so expanded especially when I am taking my 'A' levels this year.

Perhaps, the road o sitting for such a tough examination is stressing me out. Hahs. Oh well, do keep me in prayers.

2006-02-01T15:19:00.000+08:00

Happy new year!

This year's chinese new year's holidays have been extremly great for me! Despite me spring cleaning my roomonly on the eve and first day of new year, I enjoyed myself! My shelf certainly look much neater and my study table too!

The main theme of new year is nevertheless revolving around fun! Hahs! Everything went well for me thorughout the first 3 days which I went house visiting with my parents and friends. One thing that I am really grateful to my faithful God is that my money intake for ang baos has finally increased! And it has increased beyond a level which I have expected!=)

On top of that, safe trips from house to house is what I want to thank God for! Havn't you read today's The Straits Times issue which reported on 4 death accidents that have occurred in only a short span of 3 days? Wah! The figures are certainly high as compared to our accidental statistics.

Before I close, I do hope that everyone is enjoying themselves as I have and not to forget to take extreme care of yourself after the consumption of the new year goodies! =)

*School's challenging for me... Worn out but not given up yet!*

2006-01-27T00:02:00.000+08:00

It's amazing to meet so many people on a single place at a common area of Singapore as I went shopping today! Hahs.

Alright, while me and my sister were at Orchard having meal, we came across two church mates. And as we continued our shopping trip, two more popped up! Hahs. And guess what? When I landed up in Bugis in the later part of the day, I saw my ex classmates! Woah. This seems kinda weird yeA? Nahs. Everyone's just in the season of shopping! Hahs

2006-01-24T18:32:00.000+08:00

=)

I am wondering if you guys did miss me after I have disappeared for 4 days? Nahs. Oh well, that should be just a cold joke from me to 'warm' your heart up!

Before I begin, I would like to inform you guys that my classmate NG YUN JIE has officially opened a blog account! Hahs. Oh well, things will somewhat brighten up, I feel. SImply because the two of us just cannot stop laughing for goodness' sake! Hahs.

Let's move on! I must admit that I am tied up to my sleeves recently. Tonnes and tonnes of homework are waiting for me to complete before I leave for my new year's celebration. To make things worst, I hardly have time to complete them and I reckon why. In addition, I have yet to finish shopping for my new year's clothes. Perhaps I would make a trip to Orchard on Friday evening? Or Novena? Not sure yet! Hahs.

As many of us know, Lunar New Year is round the corner, and that means that schools would organise decoration competitions among classes! And so my class started to decorate the class during civics period. And guess what? The guys started to do something unique and as usual, laughters sprang forth from there. Well, I will update you all the moment I get hold of those photos.

Just when we settled down during civics, I sat down at my place and started to make use of some wires to coil into my classmates' name. And well, I did that ages ago for a 'living' back in TSS okie? Nahs. Just jk! I did that to raise money for our school's needy fund instead yea? Hahs. Back to the track now! As I sat there and talk to one of my classmates, I found the scene which I was in very familiar.

Things go like this: I was sitting on a chair, crossing my legs and tilting my head upwards so as to look at my friend who was standing up. The lights were brightly litted and all of a sudden, I found this position and place which I am in very familiar. And instantly, I recalled that I dreamt of this place where I was in today before! Okie, let's get this clear. I have never settled myself in such a scene before in real lif though I have dreamt of it. It was only today that I got to know.

If I did not remember wrongly, I should have dreamt of this scene quite some years back. Maybe in 2004? I do not know, but one thing I am sure of is that Pastor Kong's message on 'Deja Vu' two weeks back is starting to happen in my life! All this is simply getting so exciting! I cant help it but to say that my walk with God is simply so adventurous despite the obstacles which I am facing in different aspects of my life!

With this, I am certain to say that actually God has long planned me to be in JJC. I need to remember the purpose why I was there and not any other JCs after getting back my 'O' Levels results. Deep in my mind, I have once again be reminded of the loud cries of the people in JJC who needs God. I will never forget the encounters I got when I prayed over the JC that I should choose in Mar last year. It was a tough period for me, but through all those I have grown! Praise God for that!

And with this, I do hope that what I have shared is igniting your hope and faith to seeing your dreams coming to pass!

Before I end this, I have a wonderful testimony to share with all! Two weeks back, I sat for my first Chemistry topical test for the year 2006. Having day dreaming during lectures and tutorials in the past year, I missed out alot and was lagging back in my revision for that Chemistry test! The test was on Friday but I started to prepare only on Wednesday knowing that I have missed out on my lectures and tutorials. I rushed my reading on Wednesday but unfortunately I only managed to complete learning the topic on Thursday at around 7pm. Getting worried, I rushed through the remaining three topics (well, four topics in total was tested. Out of which, one was foreign to me.) and guess what? I only managed revising everything at around 7a.m when my test began at 8a.m.

Oh yes, it was certainly tough for me to calm down and my hands were trembling even after I entered the lecture hall. I prayed hard and also kept what my ministry leader had prayed for me the previous night when I called to wish her happy birthday. Things went well and God was faithful in answering my prayers.

In that paper, I was aiming for 80% i.e. 24marks out of 30. And praise God that I got 23! Well, though I had fell shot of 1 mark but it is still an A grade! Yeah!

*P.S. If you do not mind, please keep me close in your prayers in the area of my studies and relationships with the people around me! Thanks*

2006-01-21T00:41:00.000+08:00

My life revolves about many different groups of people. And many of them are people who give me their support in all that I do and on top of that, they are those who are always the first few to stretch out their hands whenever I fall so as to provide encouragment to me. We all work hard together, and also, play hard! Look at them! Hahs

Me and my ministry mates (Operations Dept)

The sisters in my cell group, W210

And of course, my cell group, W210!

Oops. Apparently, we won some awards! Hahs

Hahs! The gifts we got for gift exchange in my ministry!

Our gifts!

We had appreciation dinner with a theme whereby we have to dress up as cartoon characters. And this is the outcome of it!

Eh..This all time favourtie 'Mickey Mouse' is one of the results too! Hahs

2006-01-17T18:40:00.000+08:00

One thing that I kept repeating to my classmates day after day is the set of resolutions I have made for this year in the area of my school work. And I am extremely glad that I am doing well! Hahs. Well, I have 49.5 more weeks before my whole set of resolutions in terms of my attitude towards school is fulfilled! And so, my classmates play a very important role in encouraging me! Hahs.

I am aiming to save up money this year and make a trip to Hong Kong for a time of enjoyment at the end of this year! Hahs. Wont that be wonderful? Hehs. My aunt's going to Spain and I want to tag along with her! Well, we shall see how things progress first! Hehs.But one thing I am sure of is that this year will be the best year yet for me! I will be overcoming 'giants' one after another, and make sure I grow from glory to glory as I move on to 'fight' with stronger 'monsters'! Lols.

That is definitly true in a certain way. When school term started, I struggled to climb out of my bed to attend school. But now, I am adapting well and am attending school daily! Oh well, that is certainly a great achievment I have made because I used to attend school only four days each week last year! But, I am not going to move backwards. I want to move myself up a level! =)

As for my school work, I am still struggling to complete them on time a little. But one thing I have promised myself and God is that I am going to live my life to the fullest by giving my best in everything!

Speaking of that, I was saddened by what happened after school. Praise God that my project group's idea was among the top 10% last year among the whole current J2 cohort. We were chosen due to the quality of our idea and are given a chance to exhibit out ideas in school to the current batch of J1s so as to aid them in doing their project work.

To me, I see it as an opportunity for me to give out my best and let my Civics tutors have something nice to write about me since I do not participate in any CCA and am not part of the class committee. But my chance flew passed me when one of my group members refused to attend the briefing on the exhibition and slowly, another one became unreluctant. By the time we settled everything, the admin briefing might have ended. And woosh! My chance flew away! T_T..

Well, but now what I truly believe is that things will get better for me and I do pray that there would be more opportunities coming up for me so that my tutors will have something nice and pleasing to write about me!

*Tire and restless everything, wondering what's happening to me.. Hahs*

2006-01-16T17:49:00.000+08:00

I have grown! Yeap, I do not know but Felicia Yap did something great to me and I certainly agreed with her to a certain extend after looking at my photos! Hahs

2006-01-16T17:23:00.001+08:00

I am picking up the momentum of blogging once again. Wouldnt it be good if this is the way for all the things that we do in life? Hahs. Well, I do have two views to what I have commented. Lols.

Things are certainly picking up for me in school and I am glad that I am keeping close to my new year's resolutions in the areas of my school work and attitude towards the life f a JC student in Singapore. Oh yes, I do see the need to emphasis on the word Singapore simply because you might find it hard to come across a country like Singapore who stresses Her students so much in school.

Today has been tiring to me. I think I have yet to allow my body to have sufficient rest after my class had an outing on Friday night. The gathering was certainly great and fun over at Marina where we had a session of steamboat BBQ. Things went wild when we started queueing up to get watermelons for everyone again and again. To hype things up, plates and plates of leftover food were cooked in any way you can think of and was served to particular people. Oh well, the whole group of us played open numbers to decide the consumer! Hahs.

My class's civics tutor and GP tutor were there too. They treated us drinks and after having a scumptuous meal, majority of us went to catch Memoirs of a Geisha at PS. Oh well, it was a 1230am show and the show lasted till 3am! It was certainly stamina enduring!

After that, the 14 people who watched the show shared cabs to different locations of Singapore. And there I was, with two of my classmates and our civics tutor! Alright, for 4 people, the cab fare was $20 inclusive of the 50% midnight charge. But little did I wonder that my tutor actually treated us the trip home and yeah! I saved $5!

I got to know it only this morning when I returned her the remaining money she passed to me when she alighted the cab. Hahs! And I am truly glad that she's opening up to us a little more now, and on top of that, she's smiling and laughing more in our presence! Hahs.

That should be all about it before I start on my work again! lols. Hahs

2006-01-14T21:30:00.000+08:00

I AM BACK!

Hahs! I did not mean to disappear and leave you, my readers, hanging in the air wondering what has happened to me!

Alright, my CPU broke down and since then, I kept myself away from blogging till... my new laptop arrived! =)

Hehs. Pardon me if my language had gone rusty over the past month. Well, I do enjoy blogging alot because it does not only allow me to express my thoughts and emotions freely but also to brush up my language skills. This is the 'programme' that keeps me language up and up! lols.

Let's just move on..

2006 started and I have many goals and visions in every single aspect of my life! And now, I have 50 more weeks to go about achieving them! Alright, that is because 2 weeks have past and there are 52 weeks in a year! :D

I received many gifts during the Christmas season and mind you, my gifts (AKA blessings) are not going to stop here! Hahs

One example goes like this.. When I received my laptop, along with it was a few free gifts and one of them is a thumbdrive. However, I felt that it would be good if I am able to get a chain to tie it to it so as to ensure that I will nt misplace it easily. After searching my room for awhile, I realised that there was any suitable chain. Feeling a little dsappointed, I just stopped looking for anymore. And on the next day when I met up with my GP tutor to go for my class outing together, she passed me a bag and told me to choose anyone of the gifts inside. All were accesories for mobile phone and she told me that there was one cross inside. She helped me to look for that one cross and gave it to me! Hahs. And there I was, thanking her and God for meeting my needs! And now, I am able to tie the cross to my thumbdrive! Isn't that nice? Hehs.

There are certainly more to hear! So, if you want to find out, give me a call or meet me up! Hahs!

Time is running out for me and I need to get started on my work! =)

PS: I am going to update my photos soon! Hahaha

2005-12-11T23:27:00.000+08:00

Bright and brighter! Yeah! I am in the season where outstanding colours are surrounding my life!

Slowly but assuredly, I am regaining my form. Well, not my physical form but rather, spiritually and mentally. Picking up the broken pieces of my heart, soul and body was inevitable the moment I decided to stand upon my feet again. The process was tough, mind challenging and nonetheless, a humbling experience for me.

Picking up the pieces is one thing, while fixing it with new materials or even substituting the hopeless powder of the brittle 'glass' is another.

They are two different process in all! Well, think about it.. It is just like you earning money and spending money! Most of us work to get our money..And we will most probably end up spending the money to buy things that fill up the gaps in our lives. In short, those gaps could actually refer to either our personal needs or own desires.

So now, do you get the idea? Hahs.

Iam not afraid to tell everyone that I have just went back into becoming a lump of mold in the Potter's hands. My Potter found a speck of dust in me which destroyed both my outer and inner beauty, that was why He had to remove the dust and get me molding right from the very beginning once again.

It was a humbling experience. For many times, I have always reminded myself to be humble, because humility is the factor to doing well in life. Initially, I would pay my fullest attention to that. However, as time passes by, the exaltation in me got a little far way too high. It was so high that hardly anyone could grab it and pull it down for me! But, I do thank God for Him, for His long and mighty hands..

Getting Him to pull your exaltation was easy, but the process of Him doing it was you was a test of my will. How I would hold on to Him as He pulled me down.

Alright, my eyes are closing.. Nites to all for the itme being! =)

2005-12-10T22:45:00.000+08:00

I am going to stamp you down! You idiot!

Oops.. Idiot => Satan, e devil.

I will stand up even though I have fallen. And I will not stop getting up onto my feet no matter how many times you have attempted to trip me!

2005-12-08T21:33:00.000+08:00

I will be ending my work contract soon, and I definitely need some rest. Not only physically, but mentally too.

Attacks are just 'arriving' one after another. And what I seriously felt over the past few days was that my life keep taking the left turns instead of the right one! Hmpf, i.e. wrong turns.

I doubt anyone actually understand how I feel deep inside me. At times, I do really feel out of place though I belong truly to a group of people. Awkwardness and intimidation certainly cripple my heart.

Walking along an endless stretch of valley reflects the situation that I was previously in. For many times, darkness surrounded me, such that I was not shown any ray of light that could direct me. It practically seemed like the end for me; totally lost forever in the realm of darkness.

However, things took a turn after I attended the prayer meeting at Singapore Expo. It was a slow transition, but a powerful one. Even then, I was still attacked by negative thoughts, and also, things which I have never thought of.

Yes, I nearly broke down because I just could not understand why such situations occur to me again and again, without even giving me a break. I felt so low, there was not any difference to me being step and 'crushed' by the so called giants of my life.

Seriously speaking, I need time to digest all that are happening in my life at this moment and also, a few weeks ago. My mind is still revolving many things which I have yet to seek any understanding. No, I do not want to follow after someone whom I do not have any relationship with...

It seemed to be all of a mess but after I prayed to God yesterday, what I personally felt was tht my spirit is catching up. Slowly but assuredly, I will pick it up, but there are many doubts that I want to clear. Many, many, and many more... ...

*My mind..*

2005-12-03T21:15:00.000+08:00

Not too long ago, I blogged on the issue of me battling with endless challenges of this world non stop. And now, I am beginning to feel the peace of God and the encouragment that He has promised to provide to me as written in the Bible.

Cell group meetings are simply great! Gathering with my cell group to leanr God's word and to praise Him is simply wosh! WONDERFUL!

I must admit that I was totally blown off today after CGM ended. The presence during the meeting was so tangible and I practically felt the warmth of the LORD embracing me tightly!

Yes, I am lost..I am down..I am disappointed by the things of this world. I kept asking myself..why why and more whys endlessly! I just do not get the point why am I always the one doing this and that? And why am I always the one to get scolded at? And why should I be the one carrying the burden for others and to make room for them in my life when I already have so many appointments laid up?

Feeling unreluctant, and unwilling to give in simply made me angry. But I will always remember a verse in Proverbs that says that an angry man is a foolish man! I tried to calm myself down, but to no avail. I prayed to God and asked Him to ease my anger. But it did not help either.

God did not answer my prayers not because He did not hear me asking for Him help. Neither was Him not in the right position to calm me down. But the whole problem, which I realised, lies actually at its root, which is my heart. I can say all that I want, pray all that I want and think to myself that I want to calm down, I do not want to be angry. However, all those thoughts and sayings will never ever come to pass unless I am first, willing to let everything go.

I realise and understand that I am mean what I pray. I must be willing to let go of all my anger, my frustrations and hatreds before God can do anything to me. Friends, it goes the same to as..How can an event takes place in your life unless you first willingly gave access to it?

At the end of the day, the core of everything in life still lies with my heart.

In life, there are many things which we have dreamt of accomplishing/owning it, but..the problem is whether these dreams happen? In life, we are given the liberty to dream all that we want, but in order to let the dreams come into real life, we need to do something to our life. Changes will have to take place in order to make space for the dreams to enter into our lives. But, we must always be careful of what we dream of because, the kind of dreams will lead to the kind of changes we made to ourselves.

Changes that are made solely based on our own desires for our own luxury will slowly lead us to a changed person who might be money minded, selfish, and well, materialistic and etc. Vice versa, if you have a dream that impacts other people's lives positively, you will slowly realise yourself leading a life much more optimistically in order to influence others!

It seems strange that I have actually derived to such a conclusion because all these came instantly to my mind as I typed. All I wanted to write in the first place was to thank God for His wonderful love in my daily life and somehow it leads me to using this generous love of His to love others the way He loves me...

2005-12-03T20:43:00.000+08:00

It is interesting to find out that local news reporters have actually published reports/articles regarding Singapore bloggers again and again. And today I came across an article in Newpaper reporting that Singapore bloggers actually made it to the top by making certain controversial comments and well, photos if you would want to include in their blogs while American bloggers are made famous by publishing posts relating to financials and etc.

How true do you actually find that statement?

Oh well, that was definitely a lousy start of my entry..I am going to publish another new one.. Hahs

2005-12-03T01:05:00.000+08:00

Weekends are finally here and that simply means lYnn cHoo having some time off to take a rest and catch up with her sleep! Hahs

This week has definitely been a challenging week because I have been battling with several thoughts in my mind, even till now.

I need reasonings to help me settle down the doubts that are fighting hard against my heart every moment. Getting distracted over such little things is definitely not my will. I do find it unfair at times and I just keep expecting people to compromise with me, to spare just a little thought for my tiny winny red heart!

I need a rest before I get burnt out by the things of this..sinful world...

2005-11-28T21:16:00.000+08:00

Before I realised it, another day has gone by.

There seem to be so much things for me to complete with so little time given daily. And how will I be able to meet my needs/expectations for my every day life?

The answers lie with us having good time management and strict self discipline. For countless time, it has been much easier to think about doing a matter than to carry out the actions for it. This seem to be a statement that everyone knows but does that mean that everyone understand what this sentence is actually refering to?

*Too many things are revolving round my mind..It is all happening oto fast for me to catch up...*

2005-11-28T01:19:00.000+08:00

This blog is dying?

I certianly hope not. I will try my best to squeeze in the time to write in new entries. Almost for all the entries, I do really enjoy writing them. The feeling of excitment lies deep within me whenever I start to pen down my thoughts and afterthoughts of an events. And of course, all those, if are good, certainly requires alot of effort and time!

Nothing comes great without sacrifice. In life, there are many sacrifices which we have to make. Perhaps those are sacrifces for something which were not even meant for us to have in the first place, but most of us are just unwilling to let go and kept holding on to it tightly like a little child...

There are also sacrifces with which we made in preparation for the future. Whatever we are involved in at this very moment certainly happens for a reason. You will never know what it is unless God reveals it to you. (*Deut 29:29)

*Life is given to us for more than an event..Deep reasons lie beneath it..*

2005-11-24T23:11:00.000+08:00

Packed is the word to describe my daily schedule this time as I work. It id definitely not busy because, I still have the time to spend time with most of my friends.

I went for JC cluster prayer meeting this evening and was blessed to the extreme. God spoke a word through Xiao Ting who laid hands on me. Xiao Ting is older than me by just two years but she has just risen up to be a powerful and respectable cell group leader. Nonetheless, she had always been the one giving the members involved in POS 2006 the encouragement and support we needed back then.

God told me that I need to be like Elisha. And, I personally want to! Like Elisha, I want to hold on to the anointing of the LORD tightly. Now, I want to grab the Holy Spirit and tie it closely in my heart, in my mind and in my life!

I need to walk pass Gilgal, then Bethal, Jericho and lastly Jordan! I need to conquere all the obstacles in my life. The distractions have to be removed. Being single minded and focused are definitely the keys to revealing the glory in us; success.

I need to and I must be willing to. There seem to be countless stuff that I am so afraid to admit in life, let alone, letting go of it! And now, I must learn..I must mature and make the right decisions..

2005-11-21T02:08:00.000+08:00

It's been long since I last updated. I will not deny that many events have taken place over the past four days while I was away from this blogging world. And on top of this, things have been going very smoothly for me by the grace of God and also the protection that He has given to me.

Revelations did come to me but, I forgot to jot them down and guess what? I forgotten about the revelations that was given to me! One word to describe this: TERRIBLE!

I did receive blessings this week and things are just coming so quickly in God's kingdom. His promises that He has made not only in the bible, but personally to me too, are slowly coming to pass. It's interesting! And, I deifnitely to look forward to greater visions with a focused mind as days pass by.

What else can I say but that I really appreciate Pastor Kong to the fullest that I can! He is a wonderful man! A marvelous man! A man whom everyone should and will look upon! The energy exhuasting and time demanding efforts that he have put in while preparing life impacting sermons for the church willingly is a sacrifice which I will appreciate. God is good to have placed such a pastor in my life!

*Moving on is the best option in life. Because moving backwards will destroy your life-as for this, you should think about it. And that staying onto the same spot is equivalent to wasting your life.*

2005-11-16T21:40:00.000+08:00

I used to think that the one comment that working adults made was nonsensical and well, false. And of course, the statement that majority of them made was that studying is far way better than..working.

For many times, after I heard that, I often 'mocked' of them for making such a lame comment because to many students, we find it tough to stay and school. And there might even be a few who think that staying in school is boring and well, unnecessary. Earning money was what many of us want to do at this moment. I must admit that I am no exception.

However, this prepective of mine took a 180 degree turn after I started working on Monday. I work in an office, form 830am to 520pm. It was tough and boring to me. Tough not because I do not know how to do the tasks that were assigned to me. But rather, I feel very stupid doing all the sortings of the paper till I experienced and blockage on my first day of work! I literally went 'crazy' inside my mind!

For many times, I finally understand why working adults made that statement and how true it is! I should be able to treasure my school days from this experience onwards. Hahs

As a working adult, a day can just pass by very quickly. It just begins by you waking up and rushing for work. And by the time you knock off from work, go out for awhile and reach home, it will be around 10pm? And there you are, feeling exhuasted. Oh well, this might not apply to all but that is at least what I am experiencing now. Lols.

*I want to return to Him..*

2005-11-13T00:52:00.000+08:00

I do understand that I have been telling everyone that speaking aloud with no actions is nothing. But, do allow me to say this to you, God loves you more than what you think.

In your heart, you may feel that God loves you alot by answering your prayers, by being my comfort when you are down and by serving you as a compass when you are lost! But do always remind yourself that God loves you more than all these that He has done for you. Simply because He loves you so much till the extent that He has sacrificed the life of His son just you, a normal sinful human being.

Well, some of you may just be thinking that I am insane to type all these, or even superstitious (as for the unbelievers)! But, have you ever thought if you are even qualified to say that? I did not mean to sound harsh but, based on what do you think that you are able to comment when you have yet to experience the power of His love? Or when you do not even give God a chance to prove that He loves you?

I know that God loves me. And that, He loves me more than what my mind tells me. I wanna draw closer to Him..

2005-11-11T23:33:00.000+08:00

God has always been good to me. On top of all, He is a faithful God of mine, a friend of mine.

How will you treat a friend who has abandoned you time and time again? Or even, forgetting you? Is your response to ignore that person so as to make your friend guilty? Or will you break your ties with that friend of yours? A forgiving person like you might consider giving your friend another chance..will you? =)

Yes, I personally should admit that there are times whereby I feel weary and begin to let His existence pass by me. Moments when I felt so happy that I forgot to include Him into my joy and laughters occurred too..

I do feel sad having forgetting such a good friend and comfort. Because, the times when I felt useless, intimidated, aimless in life and fearful, He has always been the one who listens to me. Other than listening to me, He provides solutions to me and even help me to work wonders in my life!

And now, after time and time again of 'abandoning' Him, I went back to Him..to speak to Him..to share my heart felt issues with Him.. the gracious and merciful heart of His opened up His ears to listen to me. More than that is that His arms are stretched out to comfort me.

Deep in my heart, I still know that I need Him. And that, my heart is still with Him because no matter what happens, His name will just linger round my mind...

For the past few days, He answered my anxious prayers. I thank Him for all those. I got my job today as I have prayed for. And over the past few days, things went really very smoothly for me, especially for my Oral Presentation (part of Project Work) which every J1 in Singapore had been talking about. If you want to know more about it, I suggest you asking my personally because my eyes are closing soon.. =)

*nites!*

2005-11-09T23:02:00.000+08:00

Can I say that my blog entries are no longer like the way it seemed? There no longer seem to be any update of my daily activities nor my afterthoughts and feelings after it. My entries are full of what revolves around my mind at a particular instant. Why?

I alone, am unable to explain that. Perhaps now is the season for me to have a change? =)

*change is the only constant in this world*

2005-11-09T23:00:00.000+08:00

Compromise should never be an option that we take in our life.

*Find it familiar? =)*

2005-11-09T20:57:00.000+08:00

Walking past strangers brings my mind alive. Oh well, do not ever get the wrong idea! What I meant is that various thoughts will just come flowing into my mind whenever I walk past strangers, or even notice the actions of theirs! Hmmm... Hahs

*My time is my life*

2005-11-08T15:33:00.000+08:00

Breakthrough after breakthrough!

Finally, my cookies are baked crispy in and out! Wooh! Hahs.

2005-11-08T01:09:00.000+08:00

I might at anytime be shut off from this internet working world at anytime. My computer seems to be working at the time it feels like it. I felt so sabotaged!! Hahs.. Lols

2005-11-05T23:52:00.000+08:00

I felt much better. I am slowly learning to pick up the bits and pieces of my life...

It can be of anything that have took place over the past few days, or..even weeks!

Well, today has been rather an unexpected day for me. I have planned to take a rest but all that didnt take place. I went aorund Singapore today! Lol. I was at the West(my home) and I travelld to the North. After which, I went back to the West before heading to the East and last but not least, the South(or central?) part of this island which I lives on.Hahs. But all in all, I kinda enjoyed it. +)

*Nothing takes place overnight.*

2005-11-04T20:46:00.000+08:00

Wow! I bought something at Attributes sale today when I went over to church for a short fellowship! A new instrumental CD by CHC in 1997. Soothing and God's presence is ever present... I like it...

2005-11-04T20:31:00.000+08:00

My life..

How will you depict my life? How do I appear to you? What kind of impressions have I left on you? All these, you can keep it to your own. I need not know your comments and let alone your feedback to my matters.

Yes, you must be thinking.. Wow..When did Lynn become so fierce? Or even..What has happened to her?

I am not being fierce, neither have I changed for the worst. All I want is to lead a life based on the standards which I feel comfortable rather than the expectations of the world or the people around me. There is definitely no need to compare me with other people simply because God has made me in a special way; different from every other people.

I need to stand strong and not cry. That is all that I have to remind myself at all times. Yes! I have my own moments of insecurity, doubtfulness and fear. Many times, I do even feel intimidated by the critics coming out from surrounding people.

I need to have my own share of rest and peacefulness. Even then, there are times when I will lay low and keep quiet. So, I have no choice but to give my friends an answer that says that I am tired in order to be accountable to them for my quietness and so-called unusualness.

How will you feel if you were me? And, will that be how you are going to react?

2005-11-03T23:38:00.000+08:00

Alright, life is different now. And it is naturally for me to blog my entries in a different manner. =) However, my mind seem to be experiencing a blockage. As in, I have yet to shorten out the thoughts in my mind...

2005-11-01T18:50:00.000+08:00

Transition?

2005-10-30T00:36:00.000+08:00

My facial expressions can sometimes be masks that cover my inner feelings. What about you?

I may look good on the outside, but it does not mean that I will feel good!

This can be compared to a packet of expired cookies. It may be packaged very beautifully and attractive, but does its appearance necessarily mean that the cookies inside will be nice and still fresh?

I know myself. I have troubles that bother me right from the top of my head (aka mind) to my body (aka heart) and to my legs. What I meant was that the problems that I have right now do make my fearful. And there are times whereby I will tremble.

But, does all these prevent me from putting on a brave front in front of others and appear as though nothing strange has happened in my life? Unfortunately, it does not prevent. I do not want others to know the 'better' side of me. I am, in fact, running away from reality!

For many times, I seem like a repelling magnet; my relationships with the people revolving round my life have been weakened. I do am bothered by all these and am at a loss to as how should I go about handling such problems.

Once again, the problem of insecurity is back again. I am fearful of the world; the strangers whom I passby every single day. I am intimidated by others very often in one way or another. I may just not show it out, but that is exactly how I feel.

I know that no one on earth knows all this except for a Man whose name is Jesus. He is a friend waiting for me to look Him up, opening up my heart and chat with Him. He is the oppsosite pole of my magnet, attracting me to me...

I have ran away, ran and ran..but in the end, I still met Him and cannot help but to stick with Him even closer than before. I love Him and I definitely need more of His presence in my life. Please do a work in my life Jesus..

*He is the answer to my life.. and yours too. Will you run back and be attracted to Him again just like I do?*

2005-10-29T08:33:00.000+08:00

How many times can i exactly tell myself non-stop that I do not want to be surrounded by the worldy problems and that I need not actually be bothered by them?

Tell me! How many times!!!!!

Alright, that is not the question that I have been asking you all to answer me yea? =)

School holidays has officially commence and I will use my days to its fullest!

Before I end, I must tell you all that 'Amazing Race' of City Harvest Version is going to begin today for 4 hours!! Wooh!!! Hahs.

2005-10-26T22:30:00.000+08:00

Speak to me, tell me all that is revolving in your mind.

YOU! Yes! YOU! Open up your heart and share it with the people around you.

2005-10-24T17:15:00.000+08:00

Welcome me back people! Hahs!

After disappearing for a couple of days, I am finally back!!! Well, quite a number of events have definitely taken place over this short period of time.

First thing first, I am sick. And this has certainly served as a disadvantage to me at this moment. I do feel uncomfortable due to the endless 'tonnes' of phlegm stuck in my throat and my nose. They're infected for sure!

Preparing my oral presentation for my project work seems easy but in actual fact, there are a number of things which I need to be mindful of. My script seems interesting as I have intended to introduce my group by telling a story! Hmm..hahs!

Next in line is the tonnes of homework that has yet to be completed. I do wonder why I seem to be so inefficient at times! Lols.

It is then followed by me finish watching Hotel Rwanda! It is definitely a show that kept my mind wondering what exactly humanity is in this world. On top on all this, I felt challenged to put myself in the shoes of the main actor protraying as Paul Rusesabagina. Watch the show and you will definitely understand what I am refering to.

The question on whether I will continue to place the interest of the dying and lost before me is definitely worth thinking about.

Last but not least is my usual update on my personal revelations! This came very sudden as it occur in the midst of listening to Pastor Kong's sermon. This simple revelation was made known to me ages ago but it has been erased from my mind since then...

Let's just take a coin as an illustration. Every coin definitely has two sides. This is a simple logic but is there anyone who takes notice on the difference of the two sides and how we can make choices to choose the side that we prefer/want.

Similarly, here I am trying to imply to everyone that every single matter that takes place in our daily lives has two sides. And the two sides are commonly known as the good and the bad side of the matter. If something good happens, it will naturally come into our mind that this matter is good and there doesnt seem to be anything bad about it. This effect is also vice verse!

My dear readers, you all, including me, must understand that for everything that happens, there are always two surfaces whereby we can CHOOSE to look at the matter.

It something good has happen, then choose to look on the positive side that will certainly pull your spirits up! However, if something bad happens, that does not mean that we have to dwell on the dark side and keep mourning! We should instead focus on the better and beneficial part. And turn the whole nature of the matter into something which we and the people around us can view it as positive!

So, why not make a decision today believing that your day(and your dayS) can be great by focusing on the positive side of the things that occur in our life?!?

*My class is watching The Pianist now, and this show has certainly struck provoking thoughts in me!*

2005-10-20T16:52:00.000+08:00

Hotel Rwanda here I come!

I longed to watch that particular movie since last year. However due to some results, I gave that show a miss. And guess what? My GP teacher played that movie during our lesson yesterday! Hohs! I cant wait to watch the second part of the show!

The movie is definitely more than what it seems! It certainly got my mind working while watching! I would like to write a review on it if I am able to! Hahs!

2005-10-18T14:14:00.000+08:00

Is this width a better one for you guys n gals to read my entries? =)

2005-10-14T12:48:00.000+08:00

I have tried shortening my paragrahs my dear readers! But it still does not seem to help much once the entries are displayed. Perhaps, the short width of my blogskin is the problem! Hahs.

Listening to Pastor Kong's preaching, I felt so blessed once again. Though I may be attending a make-up service, I nevertheless still felt so at home! The word God has planted into Pastor Kong's mind in sinply a word in season for me!

God never fails to remind me about Him everytime I am straying away from Him. I want to have my vision back! It is no longing me asking God to grab me tight, but me reminding myself to hold God's mighty hands tightly!

As I sat through the service today, two revelations came into my mind.

Very often, many have us have the knowledge of a particular matter. However, that does not imply that we may have understanding on it. So, my very first point is that knowledge =/= understanding. I have emphasised the importance of this logic to many people around me and I, once again would like to re-enforce this.

Knowledge gives us the data and information of a particular subject, however, understanding brings us to a higher level whereby we not only possess the necessary data and information, but are also applying the knowledge in the things that we do.

Let's take for example our foundations in the things that we do in our daily lives. Many of us may know that without a strong foundation, we wont be able to rise up. Refering to a high rise building as a reference, do you think that the building will be as tall as it is without a strong and firm base? If its base is weak, the building would have collapsed the moment the weight exceeds its so called limit!

Same over here, we can apply such a principle in our lives! Be it in the work place or even in schools! In our studies, if we want to score and do well, then we definitely have to get the fundamental knowledge of subjects and let our understanding be clear cut!

In the work places, we can refer to a newly promoted manager as an example. If the manager does not has a clear idea of what has been going on in the company and has been confused about all the job scopes in the company, then he will definitely not be able to get into the 'flow' of the company and may even return to his previous position if he fails to perform well!

In short, without a firm and strong foundation in your life, as you climb higher up, your risk of falling down will increase.

I lost track of my second revelation! But I will just sidetrack a little for this time.

I simply love Pastor Kong's sermon for this week and really want to thank him for bringing me closer to God once again. I want to be someone who will climb up after falling down and someone who will learn from my mistakes!

*My mind's 'alive' again!*

2005-10-12T22:34:00.000+08:00

There are some ocassions whereby I am at a loss to as what kind of decisions I should make. And many times, rejection is the only answer I am able to provide for them. Situations do vary and I am in the midst of thinking about it...

2005-10-12T21:56:00.000+08:00

Do not worry. My blog are still very personal. =) I have just given a twist in the way I shuld present its content! Hahs.

2005-10-10T21:42:00.000+08:00

My God is good and He is faithful to me at all times, no matter what kind of situations I am in! I felt so great to have known Him as my only God and Saviour. He is none other than Jesus!

I prayed to Him day and night during my examination period. Fears left me and my heart began to calm down whenever I seek for Him. I asked Him if He could give me the wisdom and strength to sit for my papers. He said okie. Then, I decided to ask for great effieicency when I study, and He promised me. Lastly, I prayed for good results and may all praises be onto Him! He has given to me more than what I have asked for! This is definitely one way of showing His great abundance!

I thank God for scoring a high A for Math, and another A for Chem! Wosh. Though I failed my Physics by just 4 marks, I do not blame Him. Neither do I blame myself for not putting in more effort or anything. But I have arrived to a point of realisation that I failed due to a lack of preparation. And this simply shows that I need to practice more and strengthen my foundation!

And yes! I passed my Chinese! Oh yea, I did remember sharing with a few people that my mind went blank when I saw my Chinese Paper 1(Composition Paper). I looked at the questions and stared at it blankly basically because I do not understand what the compo questions were. I prayed and told God that He had promised to help me. And true indeed, He allowed my ideas to flow so abundantly and so well that I scored... ... .. Ta da! 58/70 marks! It is definitely the highest score I have ever got in my whole lifetime and this is definitely a good testimony because ever since I went to JC, my Chinese teacher has always given me a border line pass for all my compositions! Lols! God is good and good in an abundant way!

Heard from Miss Eleen Tan, my GP tutor, that I passed my paper if she does not remember wrongly. I do certainly pray very hard for it and once again, let me (or us?!?!) all give advance thanks and praise to our almighty Father in heaven!

For many weeks, I have been praying to God that He will mould me and make me into a person whom He wants me to be. I am very grateful to God for placing really loving people and caring people into my life! They have definitely prayed for me and these are the people who have been encouraging me whenever I am worried and am fearful of the things of this world. Thanks lot my dear friends!

These people has spread the love of God to me as I shared God's portion of love in my life with my loved one (basically, everyone around me!). God is good and His goodness is beyond the description I can depict in this blog! =)

2005-10-10T02:00:00.000+08:00

Every day is a different and new chapter of my life. Life has never been a routine for me whenever I serve God. In my ministry, things just keep changing for me and pushing me into a realm of different job task every single week. It seem so troublesome on the surface but it is more than that. It is challenging! And I look forward to it!

I am preparing myself to flow in the wind of the Holy Spirit!

2005-10-07T23:07:00.000+08:00

Things are once again spinning in its own realm inside my mind...

It is true that there are certain things that are beyond the control of man but, it doubt this statement applies when I have my God almighty staying by my side and watching over me.

Physical things which I need in my life and are beyond my reach were given to me upon my prayer request. However, I want to go a step deeper and ask for an impact in the lives of the people around me. They are more than my cell group members and the friends whom I hang out with; they are my family members.

Yes, though my sister and mother are both Christians, I do ponder over certain matters at times and it kept my heart feeling burden.

Teenagers will somewhat show signs of rebellion at their age but, there definitely are ways to handle these signs wisely. The question comes in the part how? How do we know the ways and methods to go about responding those signs? Well, most people handle subsequent experiences with troubled youths based on their experience and previous encounters with the teenagers they came across. However, I believe that close to 95% of the 'counsellors' only got to know how to handle their first 'case' after thinking through the situation thoroughly and after listing down the possible ways to go about dealing those problems detailedly. The problems come when people start to brainstorm about the methods and think about the best method.

How? How? and more Hows!! For me, I will seek God and depend on Him to work the way out for me. And now, I am preparing for that! What are your solutions to solving the many how questions?

2005-10-05T00:05:00.000+08:00

What does having joy in your life means? Does your joy (aka happiness) comes from the people around you? Or does it come from the material possessions that you have? Or does your joy comes along with your daily mood?

When I was much younger, my only joy came from my material possessions. As I got older and went to upper secondary level, my joy seemed to be based on the people around me. But, life's ever changing. And slowly, I seem to have shortened out my thinkings and came to a conclusion that my joy in life is based on the abrreviations of JOY. Now, it has become more than just a conclusion in my life, in fact, it is slowly integrating into my daily life!

Joy simply means:
Jesus
Others before self
You, yourself

For me, when Jesus centralise my life and my heart, I begin to feel my heart being filled up to its brim with God's love and mercy! And it came to me that if I do not share and spread this love in me, God's love will eventually stop filling up my heart in order to prevent 'spilling'! In fact, keeping all the love to myself is more than being lonely as there is not anyone to share your happiness (aka the love that you have received). Keeping everything that you have is in short, selfish.

As I share God's love and spread His love to His children, I do feel God expanding my capacity and filling my heart with an even greater amount of His blessings and promises! So friends, let's all make a promise and commit ourselves to do something that will bless the Lord, the people around us and lastly, ourselves!

*Lost in You alone.. Hearing Your words.. Sharing my heart cries with You..*

2005-10-03T12:07:00.000+08:00

I praise God for everything! Every single little thing matters! WOOohOO!

I know that this is only the beginning of His goodness! The way He works in our life is beyond my limited imagination!

*Arming up myself for a stronger spiritual warfare!*

2005-10-01T20:17:00.000+08:00

Countless events have taken place over the week. God has certainly revealed to me many things which I have never thought of, let alone asking Him for them.

I am glad that He has brought in the light of many matters into my life. Knowing the needs of my cell group members has given me a greater sense of responsiblity and on top of them , I know that God is telling me to lean more towards Him so that He can guide me in changing their lives positively. The blessed feeling of God revealing things suddenly has definitely made me realised how different God works in every situation.

It is more than a coincident that I got to know the lives of four of my cell group members in this week alone! And the most important thing which I want to highlight to you is that God has revealed their lives to me through four different methods! Like what the bible mentions: God moves in a supernatural realm in a new way every time!

I feel that I have definitely a greater sense of accountability for their lives to God. It is only in such (inconvenient) times that God will start to 'push' us to try out new things in our lives. More than that is that we are growing maturely in our walk with Him.

*It is uneasy to feel so stretched in life, but I like it.*

2005-09-29T22:58:00.000+08:00

Life is more than just fulfilling our wants. It is about fulfilling the needs of others, not the wants of others though. But our own ability has set us limits and there is surely a need to seek for ways to meet this fulfillment yea? You may be thinking of seeking God. I agree with you, but how do you go about seeking Him?

For many times, the results of everything we do has centralised our mindset and the importance on how we go about achieving success has long been abandoned in this results oriented society. Is this true in your life?

*It doesnt matter how you have scored in your current assignments because the focus is on whether you have put in the effort and see an improvement in ur current task compared to the previous one.*

2005-09-29T19:49:00.000+08:00

My mind seems to be lost in space right now. Hahs. I have nothing much to blog. But, I gotta let you guys know that I am actually doing rather well as in, I can really feel God's grace guiding me through for my revision and the papers that I have sat today. =)

Do continue to keep me in prayers just as I will promise to pray for you! Hahs! =) I love you guys as much as I love myself yea? Whahaha

2005-09-26T19:59:00.000+08:00

Just wanna say a big thank you to those who have been reading my blog entries and also those who visited this page! hehs. =) I felt really encouraged whenever people walk up to me and tell me that they have prayed for me. It is truly the love of Christ that prompts us to keep each other in prayers. Love is once again filling up my environment that is surrounded by the busyness of everyday life! And by that, the true meaning of life is beginning to surface again! =)

2005-09-23T23:30:00.000+08:00

I do not have a dream! Instead I have many dreams! I see something happening to this area of my life! And next, a new life is being given birth somewhere else! I am visualising it! One dream is definitely not enough to fulfil my hungry desire while living on this earth!

Having a dream is like running a race, a spiritual one. Working towards just one dream is an already challenging task in everyone's life, so what more can you expect when I am aiming for so many dreams at a go? Well, just take a good look at the people around you.. At times, you get to bypass someone who is so engrossed in working towards his/her goals that she seem to have lost the meaning of life.. But once again, that all depends on the kind of dreams the people have sought after!

For me, I have many dreams. In other words, I have many spiritual raceS to 'run'! And getting involved in a race in the spiritual realm is surely different from the normal ones that we see on the running tracks. Such dreams can only be fulfilled with unending commitment and strong love. In fact, we need a large amount of energy to think and ACT on those dreams!

There is definitely a need for me to draw the strength from God. 'Ask and it shall be given,' that is what the bible has mentioned! I look forward to seeing my dreams entering into this world whereby I can truly experience it on this earth!

*If you care for me, keep me in your prayers. My so called prayer list is in the entry which I have published before this. =) *

2005-09-21T22:42:00.000+08:00

The lack of inspirational text has encouraged me to go into 'hiding' for the next few days as I begin my preparation for my Promotional Examinations that will commence next Thursday. There are certainly many things that keep revolving round my tired mind, but I just am unable to sort its contents out, so let alone typing out a nice entry. =)

Even though I seem to be suffering from a 'brain' injury (due to any reason that you can crap about), my mind is clear to as what it needs. I told God about it and asked Him to strength my mind and bless me with the efficiency to do my hoework. True indeed, God is faithful to the promises that He has made in His word and has answerd my prayers. But my prayers are not just going to stop here! It needs to be developed to a higher stage.

Yes, if you guys are loving, do keep me close in your prayers. There are many areas which I need you and God to play a role in. My cell group! It is defintiely time for us to reap the seeds that we have sown over the past few months! Next, my ministry! It has not been made mention to anyone that actually Dialect Church is now trying to open up a new estate! Yes, that is none other than Teban Gardens! We really need the atm over there to be open and just pray that God's love is going to fill the whole estate as my ministry leader, one of DC's worker and me go down and have some prayer walks.

More than that are the needs of my family members. My mother sure need to experience financial breakthroughs in her business. This applies both to my sister, Sarah and me. Good health is definitely what we should ask for, especially when God's word has promised us physical healing in the bible! The word of God says that when one is saved, his whole household will be saved! So people, do keep my younger brother and father's salvations in your prayers!

As you have known, my Promotional Examinations are approaching, and I am way behind my revision. So I need you ALL to really pray to God for my health and also ask Him to expand my capacity as I begin to set aside time for Him daily. On top of that, I need the energy and strength to keep me going as I revise through my notes. More than that is that God will anoint me with His wisdom and bless me with His superb efficiency when I do my revision exercises!

Thanks lot! God bless you and He will definitely bless those who bless His children! =)

*M.I.A*

2005-09-20T14:03:00.000+08:00

M.I.A

2005-09-18T22:51:00.000+08:00

The pig typing this blog entry is definitely becoming a heavy sleeper! Hahs! Yeap, I woke up at 735am this morning when I am supposed to leave the house at 740am. Lols.

I managed to wake up when my mother asked me what time I will be leaving the house early this morning..I said 7...7.. And before I could think of the time, she quickly replied to me that it's going to be 8am soon! Lols. And popped! Yes la! Popped la! I jumped out of my bed and rushed off for a quick bath before running (and I do mean doing it literally!)to the bus stop to meet Zhi Wei! Duhx. And it happened that everyone was late by a little bit leh! Hahs. But that's okie! =)

Today's ministry outing at East Coast was certainly filled with sea sand and fun! Alright, that is our theme! We serve hard and definitely deserve to play hard too! Hehs The games that we played may seem easy and simple, but the spirit and enthusiasm in every single one of us was simply marvellous! Yeap, each group consist of people ranging from my age (in fact, I think that I am the youngest over there leh..hmm) all the way to 50+! Hahs. Okie la, maybe there's only my dear Auntie Paulene who is over 50 years old! But the youth in her is surely evident while playing the games! Hehs. In short, I enjoyed myself! =)

We headed to Parkway for fellowship in the evening and well, kinda enjoyed myself over there even though we did nothing special. Hahs. But I do know something about Singapore's politics and the occupation of an air stewardess!

Taking bus 196 from Parkway to Clementi was certainly long! But, I do not feel it because throughout the journey I was there having wonderful conversations with Sharon. Thanks lot for entertaining me even though I know that you prefer to keep quiet while sitting in a bus. Oops. Hehs

Upon reaching Clementi, there were only Maria and me. Since she stays in JE area, we took bus 99. I asked her a few questions and once again, she really reminded me about many things in the things that she has spoken. Well, she may not know it but every single word that came out from her really got my mind thinking..even till now!

True indeed, we must always be faithful to God. And there are three areas that we can be faithful in: In the little things that are given to us, in our finances and the things of others. Like what Pastor Richard Roberts preached in Service two: Never despise something that is small. It is because the bible has mentioned that everything big thing comes from something small. It is just like how big a tree can the small tiny mustard seed grows into!

*In God's race, I am not sprinting. But it is a marathon which I need to pace myself.*

2005-09-17T23:00:00.000+08:00

Life's different. It no longer is the way it was. You are just a 'spectacle' for SOME of my daily events, what makes you think that you have the right to start making assumptions and make fun of me?

*Yea, I agree that I do dislike people who start passing rumores and start making fun of people with their so called harmless remarks/jokes. But hey! In a way or another, at least I know that I am still standing strong on my conviction! Alright, I am going to toloerate all these nonsense and will try not make mention much! Blahs!*

Back to life! I am starting to mug. 10%? Yeap, one hour a day of study. I will pull up my socks and work hard for it! Working towards is goals certainly comes with a heavy price. =) Aniway, off I go to East Coast Park tomorrow for a time of sea sand and fun! Hahs

2005-09-15T22:33:00.000+08:00

It takes years to master a good language. And within weeks, the skills that have been practised over the years, the foundations have all been destroyed the moment I went to JJC! Lols. No, I am not being prejudice or anything. But that somehow just seem to be the fact!

It is no longer easy for me to continue speaking in proper languages with my friends over there! And I seem to be stutter on every single word that I speak. I just thought that maybe the problem might lie with my braces. But then again, the blame should not lie entirely on it!

Whahah! I am getting evil! Lols. Nahs. I am just getting a little hyped up over the activities that are in my life and not to forget, the increasing tension of the promotional examinations in about 12 days? =)

*Discipline is...*

2005-09-14T22:37:00.000+08:00

Life can never be explained with words. Pictures can only finish about 50% its meaning while the remaining 50% needs to be described with the colours we show in our life, and most importantly, our thoughts and feelings.

It will be a waste of time for you to read this entry if you are expecting to what I have been doing in my life. A blog lies more than my 'timetable'. It reveals my inner thoughts that came into my mind some time ago or even just a moment ago! How amazing is that?

I am leading a life which I would consider is beyond the realm of the natural. It is for me to type out and for you to find out! Hahs.

I had my first lesson of a new phrase fo Bible Study which Felicia, Ray and me have signed up for. The lesson was definitely enriching because I have learnt many principles which I am able to apply in my daily life! And more than that is that I look forward to building a more intimate relationship with my heavenly Father!

*Cracking my brain juice for something better..*

2005-09-12T00:18:00.000+08:00

I was provoked by the things that I see once again. Or rather, I feel that a great burden is landing upon me! No, not a great burden this time round, but many many burdens! Burdens for my dependence on God, my CG members, my ministry, the Chinese Church members, the new friends in my CG and lastly, the people that I have came across in my daily walk with God. It's strange for me to feel burdened for the Chinese Church members, but, the fact that my mother is inside and my encounters with them after their service ends weekly do lead me to a few conclusions which I feel that is confidential.

Please do keep me in prayers for everything, especially my sensitive nose. Once again, I have finished my medication. However, after a few days, my nose went sneezing again! It is not as bad as a running nose but..I will just sneeze all of a sudden every moment. And the worse part is that after I sneezed, I will feel itchy inside my nostriles and the nose. I am currently using a spray in the hope that my nose will not be that sensitive to the stuff aorund me, but it seem to only help a little. So guys (and gals), I do really need your prayers! God blesses those who bless His child, so..no worries! When you pray for me, God sees it and will reward you! BUT you definitely do not do that for the sake of getting the reward la! Instead, you should pray for me based on the reason that you care for me! Love needs no reason! So if you care for me, and love me as a friend, pray for me! Actions speak louder than words! Hahs.

*Keeping on the track..the narrow one..*

2005-09-10T22:59:00.000+08:00

There is only one word to describe Youth Edition: Superb! The whole session opened my eyes! Everything flowed so smoothly with God's presence floating in the midst of the room very strongly! I am definitely feeling great to see God answering my prayers! And this has certainly made me hunger for more of God in my life.

Felicia, Ray, Xuan Yu and me went to fellowship to do some shopping for the CG. Oh well, Ray and Xuan Yu went gaming while Felicia and me walked round Parco and Bugis Village till our legs went screaming for a rest!

While shopping for the CG, Felicia mentioned to me about how personal my entries are. Hahs. Everything is definitely personal, but do you guys ever wonder why?

How would you feel after forking out your precious time to read a blog site which briefs you on the party's daily routine? Imagine reading blog entries w/o any surprises or anything special..Hahs. Yeap, I do not want to tired out my readers by telling them the same things again and again. But rather, I do look forward to sharing my experiences and encounters with the people around me/readers of my blog. But nonetheless, the blog entries are not entirely personal because I do reserve secrets meant to shared with God only! Hahs! But there's at least 80% of my life being revealed publicely! =) So, no worries.

*I am excited! Woah!*

2005-09-10T02:15:00.000+08:00

My life is 'changing' every single moment! It is filled with so much suprises and before I know, something new is once again given to me!

Walking with God is definitely worthwhile, because I know that I am not wasting my time away! Hahs!

*Leaning on Him..*

2005-09-08T19:05:00.000+08:00

Hahs. Sometimes I do wonder if it is true that men can hold their temper better than women. Tell me if it is true.. Well, that is not exactly a sterotype, but I would say that majority of the brothers whom I have come across are really patient. Hahs. Yes, there are indeed lotsa wonderful brothers in church. This never came to my attention till the farewell dinner we held for Zheng Hong on Monday. Thinking about it, no matter how bad things go and how much scoldings he received at times, you will still be able to see him smiling at you and nonetheless deliver his very best performance for the task on hand!

And yes, he bought me a book for my birthday. That nearly got my eyeballs popping out! Com'on, when did you ever see Lynn reading book during her free time? At most, I wil read the Bible! Hahs. I was rather excited over getting the book because just a few days ago, I was planning of getting a self improved book for myself using the Attributes voucher that I have got over the past 3 months. Being tempted by the wide variety of CDs Attributes offers, I was in a dilema. Despite having settled my heart on buying a worship CD, I still wasnt feeling very good. Hahs. Thank God that He got someone thoughtful to get me a book that, in my own opinion, is able to meet my need.

Alright, I am 17 years old already! It is really time for me to move on and stop complaining over little things that happen daily. And true indeed, there is really a need for Jesus to wien my heart and embrace the stuff that are occuring daily. Most importantly, I have to learn how to accept the people whom I have come across in this ever changing walk of life.

I am getting so excited! It seems so blessing for me when my friends are able to make it for Youth Edition this week. Their answers were unexpected. Wosh! =)

*Up and on! Up and on in the Lord!*